Worst Jokes Ever
Knowing how to pick locks has really opened a lot of doors for me.
Why didn't the rooster cross the road?
Because he was a chicken!
Why did Stephen Hawking's wife leave him? She was sick of buying triple A batteries.
What’s the difference between a boomerang and my dad?
Only the boomerang came back. It’s been 14 years, where’s my dad?
What do you do when an orphan takes a family photo?
A selfie.
A joke, huh?
My sense of humor.
What do you get from pampered cows?
Spoiled milk.
What did one angry cow say to another?
We got some beef.
Love is like a fart. If you have to force it, it's probably shit.
/setblock minecraft_morbid_joke
/playsound pained_laugh
Fruit is like life. You slowly eat it away as it slowly also begins to rot like everyone I’ve known.
I told you ten puns to make you laugh, and I do not pun in-ten-did.
It turns out a major new study recently found that humans eat more bananas than monkeys.
It’s true. I can’t remember the last time I ate a monkey.
My wife and I have reached the difficult decision that we do not want children.
If anybody does, please just send me your contact details, and we can drop them off tomorrow.
What do you call a PEIS?
Our teacher said for two kids to stare at a wall for no reason, so I said, "Hey wall, that ass flat like a pancake from McDonald's."
I was going to invite your friends to your birthday, but they were all extinct.
Why did the pony have to gargle? Maybe because he was feeling a little hoarse.
What’s the difference between a zit and a priest? The zit waits 'til you're 12 to cum on your face.
Q: What's the best thing about fucking 28 year olds?
A: There's 20 of them.