Worst Jokes Ever

Worst Jokes Ever

So a blond and a brunette jumped out of a plane. Who hit the ground first?

The blond because she had to ask for directions.

Last night I had a dream I was swimming in lemonade... turns out I peed the bed.

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    • My friend had this annoying little kid that always used to yell and scream when he didn't get what he wanted. I told my friend there's a new attraction a few states away he could take him to.

    Confused, my friend asked me what it was. I told him, "The Sandy Hook Experience: Where you come in and leave with a 'hole' lot of fun."

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    • I don't usually like to tell 9/11 jokes for two reasons: they're morally wrong, and they tend to crash and burn.

    FEMA during a natural disaster is kinda like me during sex. Slow to respond and not a lot of satisfying results.

    I just watched a program about beavers. It was the worst dam program I've ever seen.

    The bakery where I work is being robbed. I said to the people, "I am calling the police." Then I realized they did not come for the money; they came for the bread. Huh, go figure!

    I got a heart pain then I went to [the] hospital. When the doctor says I am dead, but I run then I jump. I am not dead!

    A friend of mine tried to annoy me with bird puns, but I soon realized that toucan play at that game.

    I've always wanted to WAVE to a dolphin, but it could never SEA me.

    That dolphin is so WASHED up. WATER you say we get revenge?

    Max Heart and his gay cousin Nickals Amoto say I back out of a fight. When he said let's fight, then last minute he said he doesn't want to, then says I chickened out. I [was] ready to fight, but his gut [was] swollen [and] his arms [were]. He actually looks like Humpty Dumpty, but [I] just wanted to say he backed out + Max and Nickals are both gay with each other.