My grandpa is an asshole. The fucker deserved to die. The son of a bitch was using his life support, and I needed to change my iPhone.
Worst Jokes Ever
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get ran over by a truck.
Did you know that Helen Keller had a dog?
Well, neither did she!
Have you ever seen a baby unicorn? No! Because unicorns are gay rainbows in equine form.
Why did Ross fall off the swing?
Because he had no arms.
Stupid joke about Stephen Hawking that wasn't funny the first fucking time.
Dark Jokes R Like Puppies:
Once they come out they are trash, but once it starts to get older, that’s when it’s noticed, but when it gets too old, you either proclaim it dead or never talk about it.
(I would never do that though I love puppies)
Skidaddle skidoodle, your dick is now a noodle!
Fortnite
Mom! I think that dad is sleeping.
Mom: No, honey, I killed him.
How did Stephen Hawking die?
He rolled too far away from the outlet on the wall.
If you go to the military and you get sent to a country, how many heads will you blow off?
That number is how many dicks you suck.
Wanna hear the car joke?
Nah, it's too fast for you.
Why can't a blonde call 911?
She can't find the 11.
Jesus created the T-pose first.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because it's not original at all.
In America, there was a boy named Urhan, and he had one hand and a stump, and a girl named Handa who was an orphan. They had a trial for the Boston Red Sox, and they failed because Urhan couldn’t stump the ball, and Handa didn’t know where home was.
I bought my son an Xbox in 2017. It’s now 2018, and I’m still waiting for him to open it.
A man takes a boy into the woods.
Boy says:
"Mister, I’m scared, and it’s dark and cold."
The Man: "How do you think I feel? I’m walking out here alone!"
No, no, no, no. Spot the intruder.
There's no one.
