Worst Jokes Ever

How do you fix an igloo?

With Iglue.

Why did Sally cross the road?

She didn’t wear her seatbelt.

Why did the chipmunk swim on its back?

To keep its nuts dry.

The teacher says to do your homework. I do. My friends do. One person never does any of his homework.

Eventually, we had to have fun. He said he didn't do it. WOW what did he do? I like to think he got smacked and nearly committed suicide.

One day, this dad and his son went to a basketball factory, and the son said, "I want to buy some balls." The dad said, "What for?" The son said, "So you can have some balls."

Guess how I'm getting laid tonight?

"I'm stronger than you."

Q: Why did the blind man fall into the well?

A: Because he couldn't see that well.

When your sad don’t feel down about yourself break someone’s leg and laugh.

Isaac

I made a bet with my friend that I couldn’t create a working car with spaghetti.

You should have seen her face when I drove pasta! 😂

Knight HAHAHAHA!

There was a kid named Buttitches, and his teacher was taking attendance. Then the teacher asked, "What is your name?" And he answered, "Buttitches." Then the teacher asked again, "What's your name?" and he replied, "Buttitches." Then a student yelled out, "JUST SCRATCH YOUR ASS ALREADY!"

A guy walked into a bar.

A guy walked out of a bar.

What did the first guy say to the second?

Wanna shove a banana up yo ass?

A pirate walked into a bar with his ship's steering wheel hanging off his pants. The bartender says, "Hey! What's with the steering wheel?" The pirate says, "I don't know but it's driving me nuts!"

Did you ever hear the story about the broken pencil?

That's okay. There is really no point to it.

Why is the tire so tired?

Because it is tired out.

"Confucius say: Man go asy, full retard. It's an art, a weapon, and a lifestyle. Once you go full retard, there is no going back."

You blow a kiss up.

Your eyes were bright up your ass.

I wish my lawn was emo, so I would not have to cut it, it would cut itself.