Worst Jokes Ever
Becoming a vegetarian is a huge missed steak.
Why can't an orphan play baseball?
He doesn't know where home is.
Why do dogs howl?
Because that's the other contraction they know.
Knock knock.
"Who's there?"
A man with a drum.
"Well, tell him to beat it!"
Those were a-mug-zing jokes. They were Mugderful, and Mugjestic.
What is the difference between your new teacher and a train?
Your teacher says, "Spit out your gum," but a train says, "Choo Choo!"
Why was 6 afraid of 7?
Because 7 was a registered 6 offender.
I was out ice fishing and had no nibbles all morning.
About noon, this old guy comes out, drills a hole near mine, and starts catching fish as fast as he can bait the hook. I was getting frustrated without any luck, so I went over to ask him his secret. He said "Ymd ggt tm kppp tth yaems womg."
I said, "Excuse me, I didn't get that?" so he mumbles even louder, "Ymd ggt tm kppp tth yaems womg!" I shook my head and said, "I'm sorry, but I still didn't understand what you said."
Frustrated, the man spits out a wad out of his mouth and says, "YOU HAVE TO KEEP THE WORMS WARM!"
All doggies go to heaven - or so I've been told.
They run and play along the streets of Gold.
Why is heaven such a doggie-delight...
Why, because there's not a single cat in sight.
I was just informed that my ex was stabbed yesterday. Let's just say I quit my job as a butcher.
Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven eight(ate) nine.
When you were born your mother said, "Oh, what a treasure!" Your father said, "Yeah, let’s go bury it."
Why is 7 afraid of 8?
Because 8 ate 9, 10, 11!
Your bus is so short... the wheels touch.
These cannibal kids come running into the cave and ask their mom what's for dinner? She says, "Dad's gonna grill wieners!"
Yo mama so fat, she the iceberg.
Stephen Hawking died when he ran out of data for the month.
A french fry was talking to a potato, but the potato didn't understand what he was saying.
It was because he didn't speak French.
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When the Mexican wanted to go shopping,
he went to Ja-mall.