Read this word:
Heroine.
Did you read it like the drug or like a female superhero?
Worst Jokes Ever
How did Stephen Hawking die?
He tried to update to Windows 10, and his hard drive corrupted.
Hitler was a dic-tator.
The Annoying Orange called Donald Trump a copycat.
Ever tried Ethiopian food? No? Neither have they.
Knock knock. Who's there? You... You who? You smell like shit!
What did Jenny get for her birthday after a car accident?
An amputation.
I was talking to a close friend that was Islamic.
He said he was being shipped to an amazing training.
I asked, "Where are you going?"
He said, "Camp Bin Laden."
I asked, "What do they do there?"
He answered, "They got bomb training and hand to hand combat training. Plus they got arts and crafts."
I asked, "What do you mean by arts and crafts?"
He said, "See this towel on my head?" I nodded. "I made it out of boxer jokes."
...
I had amnesia once... maybe twice.
I slept like a log last night... woke up in the fireplace.
What's the difference between a priest and a rabbi? The rabbi cuts it off, and the priest sucks it off.
Why were the people in the Twin Towers mad? They wanted a drive-through pepperoni pizza, but got a fly-through plane instead.
Knock, knock. Who's there? Wakanda? Wakanda who? WAKANDA ENDING IS THIS?
My boyfriend is just like a sexy nerd and I still have to ask him things like that because I'm so distracted from him.
Alright, my sister is ALWAYS dancing randomly all the time, and what I say is, "Go get you boyfriend, dude!"
I have a joke about death.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get to the other side.
Think about it :)
What do you play Fallout 4 with low health?
You Fallout.
My "overweight" friend and I were talking at lunch.
Overweight friend: Man, why you so ugly, dude?
Me: *annoyed* Jason, when you stepped on the scale this morning, it asked for your weight, not your phone number.
Me: It smells like good fam.
Friend: What's good fam?
Me: Nothing much, what about you fam?
