Worst Jokes Ever

When the Lego box says 6-99 years but you eat it in 20 minutes.

Sara's Mom was helping her prepare for her driver's test.

Mom: "Okay, any questions?"

Sara: "Yes. I actually don't know what "yield" means."

Mom: "Don't worry, Hon. No one does."

A lumberjack goes to a person's house.

Then he realized the tree was too big and was stumped and had to leaf.

John saw a Gay in a wheelchair.

"I didn't know a man could be a fruit and a Vegetable!"

My girlfriend said, "GIMME EIGHT INCHES AND MAKE IT HURT!"

So I pumped my dick in her 4 times and hit her in the head with a brick.

Glad to present you a wood clock.

https://olegon.ru/clock/

My brother couldn’t wait for fall, so I tripped him.

[God creating a jellyfish]

God: How about an evil bag?

[God creating sharks]

God: Ok give them 3 rows of teeth.

Angel: Seems excessive but ok.

God: And make them mean as hell.

Angel: WTF y.

God: BECAUSSE I SAID SO.

Angel:...

God: And make one of the types have a hammer for a head.

Angel: Why do I still work for you?

God: Because I’m the only employer as of right now.

What did the leper say to the prostitute?

"Don't worry, you can keep the tip."

Stephen could not click the "I'm not a robot" button, so I guess he is fucked.

How did Stephen Hawking die?

His power went out.

My cock, lmao.

How can you tell if an ant is a boy or a girl?

If it sinks it’s a girl. If it floats, it’s boy-ant (buoyant).

Cremation, the last chance to have a smoking hot body.

What do you call an epileptic in a swimming pool? A dishwasher.

How many cops does it take to change a lightbulb?

None, they just arrest the lightbulb for being broke and beat the room for being black.

Why did the dog cross the road?

It didn't. Got hit by a car on the way to the other side.

What do you say when your friend has an ankle sprain?

"Damn bro, you got an ankle spring!"

I will always remember my grandfather's last words: "I'll just check if it's poisonous."