Worst Jokes Ever
I'm making a new movie, it's called "Veggie Tales." My star actor is Stephen Hawking.
Why did potassium draw a tear that would result in him crying?
Because all of his friends argon.
If water makes you laugh, then jokes make you pee.
I like my dynamite like I like my woman: hot and ready to explode.
Two sticks of butter walk into a butter bar. One says to the other, "Aren't you going to introduce me to your friends?" He replies, "Sure, dis my butter from another utter."
I knew the human race made mistakes, but you're the worst I've seen so far...
When a person is thinking of a high number in Roblox
-smashes keyboard-
Steven Hawking's death, you should've gotten a case.
I would kill for something to eat--the cannibal.
If Stephen Hawking was walking, they would have a hawk problem.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Charlie.
Charlie who?
Charlie Brown! Good grief!
Why can’t dinosaurs clap? They’re all dead.
Q: What is the difference between a drunk and a stoner at a stop sign?
A: The drunk guy runs it, and the stoner waits for it to turn green!
20 fridges are loaded onto a plane, only 19 come off.
Okay, moving on, you took too long. How many steps does it take to put an elephant into a fridge? (*Their reply:* Idk how many)
3: Open the fridge, put the elephant into the fridge, and close the door.
How do you put a giraffe into the fridge? (*Their reply:* 3...)
Wrong, 4: Open the fridge, take out the elephant, put in the giraffe, and close the door.
Why did Sully fall off the swing? A fridge fell on her.
Apparently, I'm a category for jokes now. Hmm... ok!
#HOMIEZ4Life
P.S. Say "crack my finger," now say it backwards :)
Why does a movie set say "break a leg"? Because they have a cast.
I hated church growing up as a child. It was always standing, kneeling, sitting, standing, kneeling, sitting. I wish the priest would just pick a position and f*** me!
Doctor: Madam, your husband needs rest and peace, so here are some sleeping pills.
Wife: Doctor, when should I give them to him?
Doctor: They are for you!
Alien vs Predator.
Cosby vs E.T.
Okay, roses are red, violets are blue, Barney looks better than you.