Worst Jokes Ever
Once upon a time, there was a man named Daniel. He was blind and deaf, and he worked at a morgue.
So one time, poor Dan got confused and started having sex with the rotting corpse.
He then came home and thought he was at the morgue, so he started disintegrating his sleeping wife.
Friends are very important. I have lots of friends in very high places. I hope the police can talk them down!
Aren't my egg yolks amazing? Don't they make you crack up? If not, I better scramble!
"Knock, knock."
"Who's there?"
"Bone."
"Bone who?"
"It's nice to meet cha'. Can we be friends? I'm bone-ly here."
A jumping cable walked into a bar and the bartender said,
"I will serve you, but don't start anything!"
The joke about is stupid.
Son: Daddy, why is this red soup so sweet?
Because your mother had diabetes.
It was an emotional wedding, even the cake was in tiers.
Why did the man put himself on fire?
To BURN Calories.
How did Stephen Hawking actually die?
He lost Wi-Fi connection.
What were Stephen Hawking's last words? The Microsoft shutdown sound.
Why didn’t Steven Hawking go to heaven? Because it was a stairway, not a rampway.
Two whales went to a bar.
The first whale said, "oooooooohhhhhh." The second whale said, "Greg, I think you're drunk, let's go home."
The baby water bottle said to the mommy water bottle, "Mommy, I lost my teddy bear." The mommy water bottle said, "Why don't you RECAP on what you said?"
Why did Stephen Hawking die?
He lost internet connection.
Why are there gates on a graveyard?
Because people are dying to get inside. Lol
The sun is already bright, stupid!
What's the difference between onions and babies?
I cry when I cut onions.
There were 500 bricks on a plane. One fell off.
Little Sally was crossing a river full of crocodiles. How did she survive the river? She had a gun. When she got out of the river, she died. Why? Because a brick fell on her head.
A penis has a sad life.
His hair is a mess, his family is nuts, his neighbor is an asshole, his best friend is a pussy, and his owner beats him up!