Worst Jokes Ever
What do you call an epileptic in a swimming pool? A dishwasher.
How many cops does it take to change a lightbulb?
None, they just arrest the lightbulb for being broke and beat the room for being black.
Why did the dog cross the road?
It didn't. Got hit by a car on the way to the other side.
What do you say when your friend has an ankle sprain?
"Damn bro, you got an ankle spring!"
I will always remember my grandfather's last words: "I'll just check if it's poisonous."
Candy is dandy.
But liquor is quicker.
Can you see me?
what do you call a baby in an oven?
my next meal.
People having seizures are just people dreaming about rollercoasters.
Why can't an orphan play baseball?
Because he can't find his parents.
I walked in a sushi bar, and the sushi chef looked very o-fish-all!
Today, my mother was making breakfast. As she was tired, my brother asked if there was anything to do today.
She responded with a list:
- Take out the trash.
- Clean your room.
- Make lunch and be sure to butter the electrical sockets.
That’s all sweetie!
A letter to all Math:
Dear Math,
Grow up and solve your own problems!
2x6= DO IT YOURSELF!!!!
What do you call a country with nukes?
Abomination.
I hear coal mining is a rock-bottom job.
My son asked me to stop singing Oasis songs in public. I said maybe.
It ain't always having erectile dysfunction, but it sure as hell ain't hard.
The undertaker's famous saying is "Rest In Peace" to all of his opponents, but really they don't rest in peace. The only peace they get is from God.
Healthcare these days is a bit of an Obamanation.
Wanna know why Stephen Hawking died?
He lost his Wi-Fi connection.