Q: What did the man say after removing another man's hat? A: He was decapitated.
Worst Jokes Ever
Want to hear an inside joke? I walked into a house.
Want to hear an outside joke? I walked out of that house.
What do you call a creepy flower? A Pedel-File!
Wanna hear a joke about measurement... never mind, it would take too long.
Yo mama so fat that when she sits down, global warming starts.
What do you call a feminine cow?
A dairy queen.
What do we call a gay Canadian?
Sophisticated cunt.
I don't want to taco about myself.
Q: What does a microwave and an M1 Garand have in common?
A: They both go “ping” when they’re done.
So Timmy was walking down the street with his friend Lea. Suddenly a car drives by and Timmy waves at the car.
Lea looks at him, puzzled, then later asks him; "Why'd you wave at that car back there?"
Timmy replies "Oh that was my brother, he went to the bar. He must just be driving home..."
Dang, it got ketchup on my sleeve. What do I do?
Spread the love!
What dinosaur loves music?
The velociRAPtor!
Why can't orphans work at S.C. Johnson? Cause it's a family company.
What do you call a fish with no legs?
Fsh have no legs.
What do you do with legs?
Fsh have no legs.
What do you do with legs?
Break!
I knead bread.
I have breakfast with my boys.
Chomp!
What do you think is going through kids' heads during school shootings? Bullets.
A man says, "I'm flying!" He realizes he was pushed out of a plane.
Little boy: Are you an orphan?
Orphan: Yes, what gave me away?
Little boy: Your parents.
