Worst Jokes Ever
You are so small that you play hockey against the curb!
Why is Cinderella white?
Because she is superior.
What is the cherry's favorite cartoon?
"Tom and Jerry!"
Will: Let's bring Hannibal a gift today!
Beverly: Yeah, I bet he’d love that!
Will: Yey!
Beverly: What should we bring him?
Will: *holds up a bucket and knife with an insane looking smile* Come in the bucket!
A guy is due to meet his friends for drinks at a bar but arrives late. When he does eventually turn up his friends ask why he is late.
The guy says, "Well, you won't believe what just happened. I was walking my usual route via the rail tracks when suddenly I saw a young, naked woman tied up next to the tracks. Of course I untied her and we had sex because I freed her."
The friends are cheering and one friend asks, "So... did you get any head?"
The guy replies, "No, I couldn't find it."
What's the difference between a maze and a depressed life? One of them you can find a way out of.
What is a cow's favorite class in school?
Moosic.
How do you get a clown to stop smiling?
You shoot him in the face.
Why is the Nazi Anthem banned in Germany? Because Horst Wessel lied.
I heard a joke about candy bars, but it wasn't very funny, so I just snickered.
What do you call a penguin in the desert?
Lost!!!!!!! Hahahaha. Banta everyone on this site has 0 life and should leave.
Q: Why did Sally fall off the building?
A: Her dad pushed her.
Three dead bodies are delivered to the mortuary one day. Each of them has a great big smile on their face.
The coroner examines the bodies and then calls the police to tell them what has happened.
"First body: Frenchman, 60, died of heart failure while making love to his mistress. Hence the enormous smile, Inspector," says the coroner.
"Second body: Scotsman, 25, won a thousand pounds on the lottery, spent it all on whisky. Died of alcohol poisoning, hence the smile."
The inspector then asks, "What about the third body?"
"Ah," says the coroner, "This is the most unusual one. Billy-Bob the redneck from Oklahoma, 30, struck by lightning."
"Why is he smiling then?" asks the inspector.
"He thought he was having his picture taken."
Why did the car key never fit in?
He was too door key.
Where does a girl with one leg work?
IHOP.
I asked a Chinese girl her number, she said "Sex, sex, sex, free sex tonight." I said, "Wow!"
Her friend corrected her by saying, "She means: 666-3629."
I think you're eggcellent!
Think like a proton--stay positive!
Q: How much does a skeleton weigh?
A: A skele-TON.
What did the fish say to the other fish? "You have a big butt!"
The other fish said, "We don't have butts......"