Why is he called Ben 10? Because he is ten in long.
Worst Jokes Ever
Make a wish kid: I want to meet Mac Miller.
Make a wish staff: You will soon, chief.
Cancer is so easy to beat. I'm already at stage four!
So, my friend's birthday is in a couple of days, and I was wondering what to get him.
He hangs out at my house a lot, so I suggested adoption papers.
Two Trojan warriors were patrolling the streets of Troy at night. It was finally time for their duties to be relieved. When they went back to their houses, one Trojan fell in a puddle. "Nitrogen!" The other called. And the other responded coldly, “Good night.”
Spy: Hahaha.
Me: What?
Spy: Time to pick up your mother.
Me: Oh no....
If I make a summer camp for kids with concentration problems, will it be a "Concentration Camp"?
I went to the National Redhead Meeting yesterday.
Not a soul in sight.
What was the computer's best pickup line?
Nice bits!
People who make puns always get pun-ched by people.
A guy is sitting at home when he hears a knock at the door. He opens the door and sees a snail on the porch. He picks up the snail and throws it as far as he can.
Three years later there’s a knock on the door. He opens it and sees the same snail. The snail says: “What the hell was that all about?”
How do you knockout an unorthodox blue tooth?
You get a good connection.
What is scarier than a pile of dead babies?
The bottom one ate its way out!
What did Onett and Threed reply to their child?
"I love you Twoson."
Me: Want to hear a joke?
Friend: Sure.
Me: When my Mum and Dad said they loved me.
Friend: What's funny about that?
Me: Because the next day they disowned me.
What's the difference between a hooker and a drug dealer?
A hooker can wash her crack and resell it.
Why can’t you hear a pterodactyl going to the toilet? Because the “p” is silent.
What did Julius say when he saw a woman stealing an expensive chandelier?
“Guards! Seize her (Caesar)!”
So, I was getting on a plane, and the pilot does his usual speech talking about altitude and what not with the microphone, and he forgets to turn it off, so after the speech I heard him and the co-pilot talking about what they were doing after work, and whatnot.
Then the pilot said he was dying for a blowjob and a coffee, so a stewardess ran to the pilots cabin, and then left about 15 minutes later, and the pilot shouted "Next time don't forget the coffee!"
Having sex while camping is fucking in-tents.
