Worst Jokes Ever
Bread is like an orphan: plain and stale and no fam.
Hey Autocorrect- STOP TAMPERING WITH MY CURSE WORDS YOU MOTHERDUCKING FORKLIFT!
"Doctor, Doctor, I feel like a pair of curtains!" "What's wrong with me!" "Calm down, calm down. Just pull yourself together!"
Chuck Norris counted to infinity. Twice.
Why can't melons get married?
Because they cantaloupe.
Why did I f*** my dad?
So I could have s€x without my mom finding out. Should I not have done that?
Are you a volcano? Because you're hot and I really lava you!
Me: *looks at person's hand* This guy doesn't have fingers!
Random person with no fingers: Why do you have to point that out?
How do you know a gay guy has been in your house?
There are speedos in the microwave.
I wanna die.
One of the reasons the skeleton was not allowed to play church music is because he had no organs.
My brother has a fucking ass and I wake up to him twerking.
What do cows read? The moospaper!
Why did Obama marry Michelle?
Because he's into chicks with dicks.
My sister was at Sixth Street and someone stepped on her toes and she bled, so she called the police! XD
TDS? More like STDs.
TDS - Too Damn Slow!
Why did the bone go on a blind date? He was bonely.
One volcano said, "Is that you, Qs? I am hot."
Two muffins are in an oven. One muffin says, "Phew, it's hot in here." The other muffin says, "OMG, a talking muffin!"