Worst Jokes Ever

Yo' mama sometimes always happens to let you know you're back in New York -- like the way people order in a restaurant: "Could you take my order before Jesus gets back? What's the matter with you? I've evolved into another species here, you understand? I can't eat clam chowder no more. I gotta see the cyborg menu, you understand?"

My teacher started talking about houses, then I said I don't want that informansion.

What comes next in the pattern, ottffs?

S, because it represents numbers going up: one, two, three, four, five, six, seven.

Why did Johnny cry?

He was molested by his sister. Johnny enjoyed it, though.

Rapist: "Get into the fucking van!"

Kid: "mi gniog ot tell ym momy"

Rapist: "Fine" (Grabs a white kid instead)

Ines.

I went into a forest with my sharp laptop with F13. Now I'm a real HACKER.

Mary is hanging out, and the angel Gabriel descends behind her. She looks behind her and says, "Jesus Christ!" and the angel Gabriel said, "So you already know."

What’s the difference a hooker an a drug dealer...?? A hooker can wash her crack an resell it.

There was a penguin breathing with his ass. One day, he sat down and he died.

People named Joey are autistic and need to die fatty.

What do astronauts eat off of? A satellite dish.

Yo mama so fat, she the iceberg.

Yo mama so fat, she the iceberg.

Why couldn't the kid with Down syndrome play football? Because he got all the downs.

Why are there no women in the NFL?

Commissioner Roger Goodell firmly believes in equal opportunity, so the girl tries out. Then, if she makes the team, we gangbang her to death. I mean, could you imagine what a scary birch she'd have to be?

@shelby denver is a massive nonce.

So I walk into Orchids Of Asia. I come out three minutes later with the best massage of my life. What's the catch? Aye, there, matey, the catch of the day be crabs.

What comes next in the pattern: ottffs?

A mom says to her son: "Hey, can you wave to that deaf kid over there?"

The son: "I don't know, can I?"

The mom: "May you?"

The son: "No, I don't have any arms!"

Roses are blood red, violets are twilight-hued oh how I wish I was dead so that I no longer have to brood.

Death would be a reprieve as I would no longer have to be true, and I would no longer have to be around any of you.