Worst Jokes Ever
Where did the king hide his armies?
In his sleevies.
Worst joke ever.
Doctor, doctor! I feel like a pair of curtains! Well, pull yourself together, then.
Doctor, doctor! My brother's crazy! He thinks he's a chicken. Is he egging around? Yes, but we need to get the eggs.
Woman: Doctor, doctor! I keep thinking I'm an elephant! Doctor: Run around the room. Then the woman stomps around the room and breaks things.
Doctor, doctor! I fell like a bell! Shall I ring you, then? When can you ring me up?
Doctor, doctor! I have a ball stuck in my throat! Shall I bat it and get a run, then?
What did 0 say to 8?
"Hey, nice belt!"
What is a vampire's favorite animal? A giraffe.
What is a vampire's favorite fruit? Neck-tarines.
Those two jokes are not funny at all!
What is the difference between a kid with cancer and dark humor?
Dark humor never dies!
If you shit in a church, is it a holy shit?
This is an a-maze-ing joke!
What's your mum's favourite food?
Chicken nuggets! HAHAHAHAHAHAHHA
What were Stephen Hawking's last words?
"I'm lagging."
What did the ocean say to the beach?
Nothing, it just waved!
What's the resemblance between a microwave and human reproduction?
They both make a sound at the end.
Ahhhhhhh!
What's the difference between anal and oral?
Oral makes your day whereas anal makes your whole weak.
What do you call a prehistoric crow? Crow-Magnon.
I told my friend an egg joke yesterday.
He thought it was eggcellent.
Make America hate again.
Why was Helen Keller's leg yellow?
Her dog was blind, too.
Sat at a busy intersection with a slice of bread, waiting for a traffic jam.
Cut a hole in the rug so he could see a dirty floor show.
He took hay to bed to feed his nightmare.
Took a tape measure to bed to see how long he slept.
Put his nose out the window so the wind will blow it.
Died with his boots on because he didn't want to hurt his toes when he kicked the bucket.
Callum Coulter
Taig