Worst Jokes Ever
What did the dirt say to the embers?
You look smoking hot.
If you're ever bored, jump on Vedanta, what is he going to do, tell his parents? (He probably will.)
What has 4 legs and 1 arm?
A pitbull dog coming back from the kids playground.
What's a duck's favorite drug?
Cwack.
If you're bored, hump Danny and fuck him. What is he, goons do fuck rock?
Helvetica and Times New Roman walk into a bar...
"GET OUT OF HERE!!!" The Bartender shouts, "We don't serve your type!"
Why is 6 afraid of 7? Cause 7 ate 9!
Did you hear about the Mormons?
A truck carrying Vicks VapoRub overturned on the highway. Amazingly, there was no congestion for eight hours straight.
My ex still misses me... But her aim is getting better every time!
What was the first man made out of? Adams! (Atoms)
You want some dead batteries? They're free of charge.
My dad left me.
Bully: Ur Gay.
Me: I'M STRAIGHTER THAN THE LINE IN OSAMA BIN LADIN'S PLAN.
Bully: *runs away and hears crash*
What is a prisoner's favorite punctuation?
A period.
Why?
Because it marks the end of a sentence.
What's the difference between a happy family and a car guy? Only one has a family.
A guy crashed his Ford SUV. He couldn't escape.
Hey girl, are you a wizard? Because you cast lit in my Final Fantasy!
What is the difference between tuna, a piano, and glue? You can tuna a piano, but you cannot piano a tuna.
(The person you ask should say what about the glue.) Response: I knew you would get stuck there.
Wanna hear a joke? Tin.