Worst Jokes Ever
If you don't stop with the puns, soon it won't be so fun.
What do you get when you go to the beach and you get a tan on your feet?
Tan toes.
Yo, three kids play hide-and-go-seek. Their names are Trouble, Manners, and Shut Up.
Shut Up hit the police station, Manners hit the trashcan. Trouble is the seeker. When they go and hide and all that shit, the policeman comes up to Shut Up and goes, "Hey kid, what's your name?"
Well, Shut Up looks at him and goes, "Shut Up."
Policeman says, "Excuse me, kid, where's your manners at?"
Shut Up goes, "Oh, Manners? In the trash."
Policeman goes, "Oh, Manners in the trash? And then policeman goes, "Hey kid, are you looking for Trouble?"
Then Shut Up goes and says, "No, Trouble's looking for me."
How does Stephen Hawking go to the toilet? He logs out.
Some people can juggle chainsaws. Chuck Norris can juggle people juggling chainsaws.
Roses are red, Your blood is too. You look like a monkey and belong in a zoo.
Do not worry, I will be there too, Not in a cage but laughing at you!
It's ironic that the more other people love you, the more you hate yourself.
We used to have a tail on the back... and now it moves forward.
I started selling landmines disguised as prayer mats.
Prophets are through the roof!
Why do elephants never get rich?
Because they work for peanuts!
When you're sitting by the mushrooms and you hear one say to the other "Hey, you're a fun guy."
When my friend eats a mint, I say, "Hey, is it mint to be sweet?"
What's the best thing about Switzerland?
I don't know, but the flag is a big plus.
I don't have any friends.
If you like this, I can be your friend :)
How do you find Will Smith in the snow?
You follow the Fresh prints.
What do you call a cow without any legs?
Ground beef!
Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhhahahaa
If the average male walks 1.7 miles a day, then why did my dad take 13 years to get the milk?
Jack and Jill went up the hill to catch some pail of water.
Jack came down, and then Jill came tumbling after, so they had a baby...
Chuck Norris doesn't fly on airplanes.
Airplanes fly on Chuck Norris.
Little Timmy walked in on his parents having sex. His parents look at him in fear. Little Timmy asks, "Mom, Dad, what are you doing?"
The mom replies with, "We are playing house. We'll let you play when you're older," the dad says. So the next day Timmy goes over to play with his friend Johnny, who was, ironically, Timmy's neighbor. Johnny asks, "How was your sleep last night?" "I saw my mom and dad playing house last night," Timmy says. "But they told me I could play with them when I'm older."
After a little bit of playing with Johnny, Timmy went home and saw his Dad playing house with his babysitter. "Dad, what are you doing?" Timmy asks. "I'm playing house with your babysitter," Timmy's Dad said. "But I saw you play house with Mom last night," Timmy told his father. "Well, don't tell your mother," his dad said.