Worst Jokes Ever

My teacher started talking about houses, then I said I don't want that informansion.

What comes next in the pattern, ottffs?

S, because it represents numbers going up: one, two, three, four, five, six, seven.

Why did Johnny cry?

He was molested by his sister. Johnny enjoyed it, though.

Rapist: "Get into the fucking van!"

Kid: "mi gniog ot tell ym momy"

Rapist: "Fine" (Grabs a white kid instead)

I can measure the speed of an object, because I want to km/s.

Ines.

I went into a forest with my sharp laptop with F13. Now I'm a real HACKER.

Mary is hanging out, and the angel Gabriel descends behind her. She looks behind her and says, "Jesus Christ!" and the angel Gabriel said, "So you already know."

I like when people say they hate me because we have something in common. <3

What’s the difference a hooker an a drug dealer...?? A hooker can wash her crack an resell it.

There was a penguin breathing with his ass. One day, he sat down and he died.

People named Joey are autistic and need to die fatty.

What did the orphan get for Christmas?

Lego figures from his friend, but they ran away too.

What do astronauts eat off of? A satellite dish.

Yo mama so fat, she the iceberg.

Yo mama so fat, she the iceberg.

Why couldn't the kid with Down syndrome play football? Because he got all the downs.

Why are there no women in the NFL?

Commissioner Roger Goodell firmly believes in equal opportunity, so the girl tries out. Then, if she makes the team, we gangbang her to death. I mean, could you imagine what a scary birch she'd have to be?

@shelby denver is a massive nonce.

Why do I f*** my mom?

Like father like son. #batabababa

So I walk into Orchids Of Asia. I come out three minutes later with the best massage of my life. What's the catch? Aye, there, matey, the catch of the day be crabs.