Worst Jokes Ever
Bonjour all ;-) , nd here a frog ( French) joke lol.
Qui a inventé le mètre et qui a inventé le centimètre? (Who invented the meter, and who invented the centimeter?)
Answer: Adam à inventé le mêtre, parce qu'il voulait le (mettre) de dans... (Adam invented the meter because he wanted to put it in).
Eve à inventée le centimetre, parce qu'elle voulait, le sentir-metre (centimetre) Eve invented the centimeter, because she wanted to feel it when going in...
What's both red, white and sometimes purple?
My arms...
I will always remember my dad's last words....
"15 dollars and I'll jump."
Three Europeans come to America. They all get captured by Native Americans, and they want to kill them. But the Europeans beg to have their lives spared.
The Native Americans agreed to not kill them on one condition: The Europeans must go into the forest and bring back a fruit, and they will be informed what to do with it. So the first guy comes back with a peach. The Native American says, "Shove it up your ass, if you laugh we kill you." So, he shoves the peach up his ass, and he laughs, and the Native Americans kill him.
The second guy comes back with a grape. The Native American tells him the same thing. He laughs and the Native American kills him. They both see each other in heaven and the first guy says to the second guy, "I had a peach, and peaches are fuzzy, so that's why I laughed, but you had a grape, what happened?"
The second guy says, “Oh yeah, I was doing just fine until I saw the other guy come back with a pineapple!”
Wanna know what's funny? Scott's low joke standards.
So my teacher's daughter committed suicide.
One day I'ma go up to her and say, "What's wrong, did Logan Paul leave your daughter hanging?"
It's really great that you can make fun of orphans, 'cause what are they going to do? Tell their parents?
I like my kids like I like my lamps.
Hung from the ceiling.
Have you ever heard of Jane Doe? Well, her husband's name is Dill, so I guess that makes him a dildo!
Spell "I cup..." "I see you pee!"
What would an orphan ask for Christmas?
"A someone."
If Trump was an orphan, I know he would know not to build a wall because he was in one most of his life.
Why did Stephen Hawking die?
Because there was a power cut.
Stephen Hawking's death was because he lost WiFi connection.
FRIEND: Hey, want to come to my house?
LONELY ORPHAN/TRUMP: Want to come to my orphange?
FRIEND: Dude, I'm blocking you!
LONELY ORPHAN: :(
Angelina Jolie was married to Brad Pitt...
Does that make her a "Brad Nailer", and him a "Jolie Jumper"?
You know, people always say your life is worth it, but with me, it's worth-it-less.
How do you make a blind girl smile? Leave the plunger in the toilet.
Man asking waitress, "Pardon me, miss, may I ask you about the menu, please?"
Waitress, "It's none of your business about the men I please!"
Have you heard the latest pun about pizza?
Never mind. It’s too cheesy!