Worst Jokes Ever
Every single person on the plane died except for 2. How is that possible?
It said all the single people died; the 2 were a couple. That's how it was possible.
Post Malone was in the hospital, but he is BETTER NOW.
Why was Stephen Hawking always bullied?
Because he couldn’t stand up for himself.
What is the similarity between an anti-joke and a clown? Neither are funny.
A police officer pulls a man over. "Hands in the air!"
The man said, "Okay."
Biggest lie ever told: it was the cat.
Fact: If you jump off a 12-story building, you will not like the result.
I don't think jokes are very funny.
What is this joke?
Why did your friend eat the burger?
Because he wanted to murder all burgers and was starting with this one!
Not really. He was just hungry.
What do you get when you cross a chicken and a horse?
An animal abuse warrant.
Why aren't dogs known as carrots? Because they aren't.
What did the doctor say to the mother after delivering the baby? Sorry.
Why can't a little girl fly? She doesn't have the proper motivation.
What do a moose and a triceratops have in common?
Both have noses.
Person: "Doctor, doctor, I've only got 50 seconds to live!"
Doctor: "Just give me a minute!"
If the shoe doesn't fit, there's no evidence.
I am a sheep.
I never wanted to believe that my dad was stealing from his job as a road worker.
But when I got home, all the signs were there.
I was watching my boyfriend's dog while he took a shower. I started playing fetch with him when the ball went over the balcony. He went to get it and fell 10 stories. When I looked down, he appeared to be dead.
My boyfriend loved his dog and I didn't know what to do, so feeling awful, I sat on the couch and waited for him to come back. About three minutes later he got out of the shower. He ordered some food and went to the table to eat when I said, "You know, your dog's been a little depressed lately..."