What’s the similarity between a bag of chips and a gun?

When you pull one out in class, everybody wants to be your friend.

Why is Sunday better than Monday?

Because Monday is a weak day.

One day an orphan threw a boomerang and it didn’t come back like it’s parents


If you spin a fidget spinner You’ll end up spinning it too fast when you end up spinning it too fast It will make you fly away when you fly away you’ll end up in a tree when you end up in a tree You’ll see that your friends are hanging out without you When you see that your friends are hanging out without you You’ll run away in the woods because your sad When you ran away in the woods you’ll see a bear when you see a bear it will chase you when the bear chases you you’ll build a fort to protect yourself when you build a fort to protect yourself You than notice your lonely You’ll become friends with the bear When you become friends with a bear, you’ll start to act like a bear when you start to act like a bear You will become a bear DO NOT BECOME A BEAR NEVER PLAY WITH A FIDGET SPINNER

orphans have no parents

I did have a good time today I did

What is the octopuses favorite shape

An octagon

org.springframework.beans.factory.BeanCreationException: Error creating a bean with name X

What did the kangaroo say to the elephant. Hi up there

I Am glass! People see right through me.

What’s the difference between a mediocre thief and professional thief? The mediocre thief will say “give me all your money!” And a professional thief will say “sign here please.”

What did the tree say to his sister? Wood you please leaf me alone you son of a birch.

What is a kid 🧒 who loves school 🏫? A smart kid 🧒

What is a difference between a tree and a school? A school is for kids and a tree is for birds

I have a brother and he told me this quote no wonder they had a second child they messed up on the first one“ he’s the second child… I’m the first…

Why did the lemon 🍋 go to the doctor 👩‍⚕️?

Because he had a sour stomach.

Hitler visits a lunatic asylum. The patients give the Hitler salute. As he passes down the line he comes across a woman who Isn’’t saluting. “Why are you not saluting like the others?” Hitler barks. “"Mein Führer, I’m the nurse," she responds "I’m not crazy!”

A poster for the winter relief fund reads: "No one should be allowed to go hungry or suffer from the cold." A worker says to his friend, “now were not even allowed to do that.”