Worst Jokes Ever
I gave a blind kid a gun and told him it was a hairdryer.
Have you ever had duck sausage? No? How about you duck on down and get yourself some!
Me: I'm home, ma! Here's her with a new dad. Her: Go hang with someone. Me: Gets the noose, goes to fav tree. I love you, ma. 🙂
Yo mom is so fat that when she stands on a scale, she broke it, lol.
Mom!
Do you know what you call a bunch of depressed kids?
"Suicide Squad!"
What's the difference between a painting and Jesus?
A painting only needs one nail.
What's the difference between my mum and my dad?
My mum stayed.
How many letters are in the English Alphabet?
Twenty-two. ET went home, P ran down his leg, and he took ME with him.
Why do women have periods? Because they deserve them!
What do queer guys call hemorrhoids? Speed bumps!
A man asked for poison and another man gave it to him. The first man took a sip and said, "hmmm, this tastes like arsenic." He took a sip of another and said, "hmmm, this tastes like cyanide. A very unpleasant taste that brings back memories."
Why do dogs lick their balls? Because they can.
Sorry for the interruption. I am ALYA, and I am disappointed in you guys. You shouldn't bully or make fun of orphans. They didn't choose their life or what happened in their life. What happens if you were an orphan and people were making fun of you? Would you like that?
Paddy and Murphy are walking down the street when all of a sudden, Paddy falls down a manhole. Murphy shouts down, "Paddy, is it dark down there?"
Paddy shouts up, "Dunno Murphy, I crnt see a fecking thing!"
How many gangsters does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
35! Do you have a problem with that?
What’s blue and comes in brownies?
Cub Scouts.
Why'd the rubber go flying across the room?
Because it got pissed off!
Did you know Cobain had dandruff? Yep. They found his head and shoulders all over the back of his couch.
What does a shark smoke? Sea-weed.
How do whales breathe underwater? They take a deep meth.