Worst Jokes Ever

Why can’t an orphan play baseball?

Because they don’t know where home is.

Why did the chicken cross the road to get to the chicken coop?

I know I've changed my name from tj to selfish king but know it's gunna be selfishking#781.

Why did LazarBeam kiss a man?

Because he couldn't kiss Fresh; he was already gay.

Jon said: What do you call a pregnant woman?

Mike said: I don’t know, what?

Jon said: Kinder surprise.

What were my great grandpa's last words?

"SHIT MG42!!!"

What is the opposite of Christopher Reeve?

Christopher Walken.

So a mom went to her kid and said, "If you pray to God, He will give you your sight back." So he did exactly that.

The next morning, the mom heard a scream, so she went to the kid's room and asked, "What's wrong?" The kid replied, "It didn't work!" The mom said, "April Fools!"

Priests are called father because it would be suspicious to call him daddy.

What show do orphans hate?

"American Dad."

Read my name. 👍🇮🇪

What do you call a reverse exorcism?

It's where a demon pulls a priest out of a child.

Why did the orphan go to the woods? To take a *what*?

When the school shooter finds you and you think you’re gonna die, but he remembers the time you gave him a pen.

I have a fish that can break dance. Only for about 20 seconds, and only once.

Roses are red. Your blood is too. You look like a monkey And belong in a zoo.

Do not worry, I will be there too. Not in the cage, But laughing at you.

Why are short people sad?

Don't judge though, it's crap but...

Because they couldn't reach happiness.

Teacher: If you keep talking over me, I'll call your parents!

Orphan: You will?

Mom!

I bet when your mom first saw you, she said, "Oh my god, this ain't my child. My child would look amazing."