Your hairline is like mount ecrus points
Your hairlines exactly like your nose it’s always offside
Your hairline is like Justin Bieber’s buzz cut
A cop saw an old lady carring two sacks. He asked the lady what she was doing. She opened one bag and shows a bunch of cash. "How did you get all this?" asked the cop. "Well, I live behind a golf course, and my backyard has many holes in its fence. Since there are no bathrooms nearby, the golfers stick their dicks through the holes and piss onto my hard, and that keeps killing my flowers. So, I grapped by hedge clippers, and when they stick it through, I grab their dick and yell, '10 bucks right now or it comes clean off!' After that nobody pees in my yard ever again." The cop responded with, "Dang. But what about the other bag?" She said, "Not everybody paid."
What is the similarity of a bomb and a baby.
When you drop them both, everyone screams.
Where can you find the most dads. Milk island.
The earth used to be flat until you mama was buried
When i was going downstairs Sum Ting Wong fell and doctors say Sum Ting Wong happened
Yo mama so fat she thought RAW MEN was RAMEN
Yo mama so STUPID she thought the rams football team were actual RAMS
Yo Mama is so STUPID she thought the football team Rams were actually the animal Rams
why is America bad at playing Clash of Clans?
because they already lost two towers
Hey let’s go we are heading for theTowers!
Wait what?
call 911!
Once I got one so big they were going to make 9/11 2.0
Once my twin brother died from a plane crash he’s last words were if its a bomb ill give it a 9/11
Once I almost died ill give it another shot out of the gun to finish my job
My girlfriend left a note on the TV saying "This isn't working". I don't know what she's talking about, the TV works perfectly fine
Today I went to the doctor for a test and he said I have 10 months to live. So later that day I stabbed him to death & the judge sentenced me for 15 years in prison. Problem solved
How to you know if your making a caesar salad ? Stabbing it 23 times
One day I went to my friend's apartment and he told me to make myself home. I threw him out of the window. I hate having visitors
