Your hairline dates so far back like when your dad left.
Worst Jokes Ever
Who did the cow want to hang with?
The udders.
Two guys watching a war movie at a bar are talking. One says to the other, "The Nazis starved my dad to death in a concentration camp during the war."
The other says, "My dad died in a camp as well... he broke his neck."
First guy says, "How did he break his neck?"
Second guy says, "He fell out of the guard tower."
What's the difference between a boomerang and parents to an orphan?
The boomerang comes back.
Yo mama is so ugly, her pictures hang themselves.
Yo mama so old, when she left the antique shop, the alarm went off.
Hey, Britain, no queen? :(
Hey, America. No towers? :(
What do you say to an upset German?
Quit being such a sauerkraut!
Why is the Tower of Pisa leaning?
Because unlike the Twin Towers it can dodge.
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Your dead son.
What does a terrorist do when they see a twin?
They fly a plane at them.
Your mom disrespected your dad when he saw your face.
What are the similarities between a blind person and an orphan?
Neither can see their parents.
What do you call a group of emos about to jump off a bridge? Suicide Squad.
I asked my kid to give me a hand. That motherfucker cried while charging his mechanical arm.
Q: What do you get when you cross Raggedy Ann with the Pillsbury Dough Boy?
A: A red-headed bitch with a yeast infection.
Why did the doctor tell the man to go for a mountain walk?
Alps clear the mind! Haha.
Someone at school asked what makeup I was wearing.
I said, "a smile."
They are now following me around asking if my mental health is okay.
My plan to avoid them is to not go to school.
Going to school is mandatory in this country.
Can you guess my plan?
Why is England's team unfair in chess?
Because 2 rooks = 10 and a queen = 9.
