Worst Jokes Ever
A dick has a sad life. His hair's a mess, his family is nuts, his neighbor's an asshole, his best friend's a pussy, and his owner beats him.
If you drink hand sanitizer, does it only kill 99.9% of you?...........💀
When the teacher gives me an F on my exam,
but I have an AK-47 in my backpack.
*Is honestly the best policy.*
Yo mama is so fat, when she stepped on the scale, it says, "To be continued."
Oompa Loompa Doobity doo, I got a glock and it’s pointing at you.
Why isn’t there a pregnant Barbie doll?
Ken came in another box.
Why are people acting like Kamala Harris is the first woman to obtain such a high-ranking position in the US government?
Have we all forgotten that Monica Lewinsky was directly under Bill Clinton?
Did you hear about the guy who died of a Viagra overdose?
They couldn’t close his casket.
What do you call a teenage boy who doesn’t masturbate?
A liar.
Christopher's Mom said, "One man's trash is another man's treasure."
Turns out Christopher was adopted.
How come pizza boxes are square when the pizza is a circle cut into triangles?
Hillary Clinton could be the first F president ever elected into office.
Sorry, it was supposed to say "Female," but the "emale" got deleted.
What's the difference between a priest and a pimple?
A pimple will wait until you're 12 years old to come on your face.
My son came up to me and said, "Dad, I'm depressed."
I pointed to the spare room and said, "Hang in there, son."
What do you get when you dip a duck in blue paint?
A very pissed duck.
I had a JFK joke, but it went right through my head.
Why is it so hard to break up with a Japanese girl?
You have to drop the bomb twice before she gets it.
Why do white people own a lot of pets?
Because they're not allowed to own people anymore.
My girlfriend went to Tokyo, and she died in the tsunami.
Since I was sad, my friend told me, "Don't worry, there's plenty more in the ocean."
Your mum is so slow, it took her nine months to make a joke.