Worst Jokes Ever
Why do female parachutists have to wear tampons before they jump?
So they don't whistle on the way down!
What do you call a person who's got their wisdom tooth removed too late?
Dumb.
Why shouldn’t you pick on a midget with learning difficulties?
... Because it’s not big and it’s not clever.
My girl walks in the room in nude mode and sat on my dick. I said, "What up, your pussy?" She said, "Your dick."
Ran out of toilet paper, so had to start using lettuce leaves... today was the tip of the iceberg.
What did your mom say last night? "Go harder!"
What do you get when a cow doesn't give any more milk?
A milk dud 😂
What is a kidnapper’s favorite shoe?
White Vans.
What did the poop say to the toilet paper? “You’re on a roll!”
What kind of coffee do they serve at funerals?
Burial grounds.
What’s an abbreviation for school in America?
Shooting range.
Jokes just as dead as the victims.
What do you call a pig that does karate?
PORK-CHOP
What do depressed people and Apple's have in common?
They both hang from trees.
1. What's the difference between Dark humor and Morbid humor? Dark humor is 10 babies in 1 trash can and Morbid humor is 1 baby in 10 trash cans.
2. What's the difference between a pizza and a baby? A pizza doesn't scream in the oven.
Aboriginals around for 50,000 years invented the spear.
I refuse to believe my dad got fired as a road worker for theft. But when I came home, there were signs everywhere.
What goes black, white, black, white, down a hill?
A fat nun.
What is the difference between a priest and a doctor?
The doctor doesn't like to give physicals.
Little Johnny was eating dinner with his family. His mother went around the table and asked, "Mark, what would you like to eat?" Mark said, "I'd like some fucking potatoes." *SMACK*! Mother slapped Mark. She then asked Suzie, "What would you like to eat?" "Well, I'd like some fucking potatoes," said Suzie. *SMAACK*! She slapped Suzie. "Okay, Johnny, what would you like to eat?" "Well.... I sure as hell don't want no fucking potatoes."
What has 4 wheels, 2 legs, and loves his shoulder?
Stephen Hawking.