Worst Jokes Ever

Worst Jokes Ever

I saw a man trying to rape a girl. I decided to help. She didn't stand a chance against both of us.

Q: If George Washington was alive today, what would he do?

A: Scratch mercilessly at the coffin walls, while screaming at the top of his lungs!

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  • Children should never run with scissors, and lesbians should never scissor with the runs.

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  • What's a similarity between your best friend and a tree?

    They both fall over when you hit them with an axe.

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  • My dad posted a picture of his condom challenge fail to his social media - it was a picture of me.

    What's worse than eating 5 raw oysters out of your grandmother's vagina?

    Realizing you only put in 4.

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  • You’re Russian when you go to the bathroom and Finnish when you come out. What are you in the bathroom?

    European.

    Q: Why do Norwegian ships have bar codes on them?

    A: So when they come into port they can Scan-Da-Navy-In!

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  • Justin: Hey.

    Josh: Hey man.

    Justin: Why only "man"?

    Josh: It feels weird saying the r a c e y names.

    Justin: I don't mind.

    Josh: Okay, S L A V E.

    Justin: Oh no, not T H A T one!

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  • How many Russians does it take to change a light bulb?

    I don't know, they just keep Putin them in.

    If you're ever bored, punch an orphan. What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?