Theogony jokes

Day

After God created 24 hours of alternating darkness and light, one of the angels asked him, "What are you going to do now?"

God said, "I think I'm going to call it a day."

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  • Spider

    God creating spiders.

    God: "Make it have 8 legs." Angel: "Ok? Bit excessive but ok." God: "And 8 eyes." Angel: "You need to calm down and li-" God: "Give it a butt rope!"

    Cat

    God creating cats.

    GOD: Make the most fluffy cute thing you can think of.

    ANGEL: Ok.......................................anything else?

    GOD: YES, PUT RAZOR BLADES ON ITS FEET!!!!!!!!

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  • God

    Why are Egyptian gods orphans?

    Because Egypt needs to sell Anubis (a new bus) every year to make a prophet.

    Adam

    Mom, how were hoomans made? Son, it’s because Adam and Eve were brought down by God and made babies!

    Dad, how were hoomans made? Son, us humans evolved from monkeys!

    Mom, Dad said hoomans were evolved from monkeys, is that true? Oh son, (ruffles smol man’s hair) your dad was telling you his side of the family, and I was telling my side :)

    Community