The jokes
Why are orphans so fond of shadows?
They're the only thing that accompanies them always.
What's the difference between bounties and orphans?
The bounty is wanted.
A wise man once told me: "If you poke the bear in prison, the bear will happily return the favor when it's time to shower."
What's the difference between Donald Trump and an orange?
The orange tastes good.
I got detention yesterday because I called the group of emo kids the suicide squad.
Why do you always high five the emo person? 'Cause you can't just leave them hanging.
Some people say I'm rude, but I think I'm pretty nice because the other day I saw this kid crying on the road and I asked him where his parents were. I just love looking at an orphanage.
Why did the orphan cross the road?
Not to see his parents.
What does a baby and a grenade have in common?
They both make noise after you throw them.
I am Buzz Aldrin, the second man to walk on the moon.
Neil before me.
The dark side of kid songs:
You got a friend in me... you got a friend in me!
You know stairs, right? The dark... My there is something. I know that if you fall down the stairs, your balls will be crushed!
What were the balloon's last words to his Father?
"Watch me, Pop!"
Why does Michael Jackson like Chef Boyardee? He likes the little balls.
What is the difference between an apple and an orphan?
One gets picked, and the other doesn’t.
How did the orphan become famous?
By "go[ing] big or go[ing] home."
Your sister is so stupid, when she saw Mountain Dew, she went to the top of a mountain to get it.
What’s the difference between a cow and 9/11?
A cow can’t be milked for 21 years.
What's long and black, the line to KFC.
The gayest person in the world is Pacman, because I can pay him 50 cents to eat 200 balls.