The jokes
What is the definition of "Endless Love"?
Answer: Helen Keller and Stevie Wonder playing "Tennis"!
Why can’t Chinese people play baseball?
Because they ate the bay.
"The truest things ARE the funniest things."
-Lollipop from JacknJellify, the BFDI series.
Man: Aw man, I'm having a bad day.
Man's friend: Same.
Man: So why did you have a bad day? My brother got hit by the school bus.
Man's friend: I got fired as a bus driver.
Man: Oh great heavens!
My mom said if I'm awake playing Roblox still, she said she was going to bang my head against the keyboard. hxhdhduhxbsfj.
What do you call a baby on the battlefield?
Free shield!
What did one saggy boob say to the other saggy boob?
"If we don't get some support soon, people will start to think we are balls."
Why does the orphan have water with its cereal?
Their dad never came back with the milk.
I heard you were looking for a stud...
I already have the STD; all I need is you.
Roses are red, violets are blue, I'll be the dolphin, you can be the jellyfish.
Question: What is the BIG ADVANTAGE to going out on a date with a "Homeless Chic"?
Answer: After the date, you can "Drop Her Off" ANYWHERE!
I had a terrifying experience last night. I was alone in the house having a bath... when all of a sudden... I felt a tap on my shoulder.
When life gives you lemons... call them yellow oranges and sell 'em for double the price!
I was with my friend atom the other day. He’s pretty tall . . . Compared to you.
Pete the panther was racing a cheetah but lost. The cheetah said, "You can’t beat me, I’m a cheetah." Pete said, "Yeah, you are a cheetah cheetah."
Your hairline is so big, Niagara Falls said, "Oh, looks like we've got some competition!"
There was a math teacher on a plane that crashed. What was the last thing that went through their head?
A pentagon.
What do emos and apples have in common? They both hang from trees.
How to fall down the stairs:
Step 1, 2, 3, 6, 10, floor.
Why is 6 scared of 7? Because 7 8 9.
But why is 10 scared? Because he is in the middle of 9/11.