The jokes
What's the difference between a priest and acne? At least acne waits til the boy is 12 to come on his face.
Knott and Shott got into a gunfight. Knott was shot and Shott was not. Therefore, it was better to be Shott than Knott. But what if the shot Shott shot didn't hit Knott but Shott? Then the shot Shott shot shot Shott.
What did Hitler say after his parents bought a hauler?
How much did the haulla-cost?
When the school shooter kills the teacher and the autistic kid declares communism
A husband and a wife have four children. The oldest three are tall with blonde hair. The youngest is short with brown hair. The husband was on his deathbed and said, "Honey, can you be completely honest with me? Is our youngest son mine?" The wife says, "I swear to all that is holy, he is your son." Then the husband died and the wife muttered, "Thank god he didn't ask about the other three."
Your mother is such a slut, she should be in the NFL hall of fame for the greatest wide receiver!
When I get naked in the shower, it gets turned on.
Have you heard the joke about the sheep, drum, and snake?
"Baa" "dumm" "tsss"
An infinite amount of mathematicians walked into a bar. The first ordered a pint, the second ordered a half pint, the third ordered a fourth-pint, etc. The Bartender eventually walked up and gave them two pints and said: "You mathematicians don't know your limits."
Why did Sarah fall off the swing?
Because she has no arms.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Not Sarah.
What do you call the Spanish translation of the 9th Star Wars movie?
Rogue Juan.
What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef.
What do you call a cow with three legs? Lean beef.
What do you call a cow with two legs? Read the title.
The black nurse tells me she has been a vegan for 29 years. The father sitting next to me asks, "So you don't miss fried chicken?"
Immigration jokes just cross the line.
Did you hear about the person who invented the door knocker?
He won a no-bell prize.
What do you call a white girl that can run faster than her brothers?
The redneck virgin.
There are some sounds that everyone loves... - Shoes on gravel. - Crackling of fire. - The snapping necks of those who think they can disrespect you. - Cats purring.
Why was the Pokemon under your bed? So it can Pikachu.
Yo mama is so fat, when she came on this website, the whole server crashed!
Question: What's brown and sitting on the piano bench?
Answer: Beethoven's last movement.