The jokes
There's a kid named Little Johnny who would always cuss. Well, one day, he was sitting in class and the teacher said, "Let's play a game." So the game was she calls out a letter and someone raises her hand and tells her a word that begins with that letter. The teacher says "A". Little Johnny raises his hand and the teacher thinks to herself, "Well, he might say something like a**." So the teacher calls on Sally. Sally says "apple". The teacher says "B". Little Johnny raises his hand. The teacher thought, "No, he might say something like b!tch." So the teacher goes all the way to R. The teacher says "R". Little Johnny raises his hand and says, "Me, me, please, I really know one." Then the teacher thinks to herself, "Well, there's no cuss word that starts with R," so she said, "Okay, Johnny, give me a word that starts with R." Little Johnny says, "A rat!" and the teacher, very pleased, says, "Very good, Johnny. What type of rat?" Little Johnny says, "A big gosh damn mother freaker."
Sorry, I had to edit some word, but y'all know what I meant.
When the school shooter pulls the fire alarm, and the autistic kid thinks it’s a rave party.
Kid: My parents want to meet you, you wanna come over?
Orphan: Na, I'm good. I'm going to watch Home Alone. It's the only movie that I can think of that's related to me.
In case there's a school shooting, the teachers can help out and shoot the kids.
I didn’t know Stephen Hawking died. Oh god, it must have been when I disconnected the Wi-Fi!
I know how unicorns make babies. The dad puts his horn in the girl's butt hole.
When the school shooter is getting roasted because of his Pokemon lunch box, but they don't know that there is a Glock 34 inside.
What’s the best Marvel villain song EVER?
It Was Agatha All Along!!! *gasp* And I killed Sparky, too. *laughs manically*
Why is the dog having KFC? Because the dog has no friends.
Why is 2020 the worst year? Because COVID-19!
What is the difference between an orphan and an apple?
One gets picked.
Do you know how babies are made? The boy puts his penis in the girl's butt and goes up and down for ten minutes. Then the girl takes a pregnancy test, and if it says no, then you keep doing it until she is pregnant.
The boy will lick the girl down there, and she will put his penis in her mouth and suck it. Then he will spit on his hand and rub it on her boobs and lick/suck them.
Hi Liv & KK! It's me Gwen, remember me from the orphan joke protest?
Friend: My mum took my phone from me, and I really want it back.
Me: Yeah, well, Hades took my parents from me, and the funny thing is, I don't want them back.
I'm lookin' for some good jokes for the best song award. Can y'all help a fellow out?
The "f" in "orphan" stands for "amily." There is no "f."
An orphan was playing with a famous baseball player. The baseball player walks up to him and says, "Dude, I gotta teach you." The orphan goes, "Why? I got all your moves down." The baseball player goes, "But kid, you can never find home, though."
I like you, you like me.
Let’s go out and kill Barney with a big shot gun. Barney’s on the floor, no more purple dinosaur. 🌸🌸🌸🌺🌺🌺🥀🥀🥀RIP BARNEY
What do you call a 3-sum with a girl with AIDS?
Nut in the butt.
I like my kids how I like my lights, Hanging from the ceiling.