The jokes
Why can't homeless people buy a house?
'Cause they live on the streets.
Who are the fastest readers in the world?
The 9/11 victims. They went through 200 stories.
What do girls and rocks have in common?
The flat ones get skipped.
Cousins on the streets means lovers in the sheets. 😂👀
It’s me back at it again.
The earth was flat till they buried yo mama!!!
I asked a girl I met if I could take her out to dinner.
The joke is I knew right after she said, "I'll call you," she was lying to me, not surprised even a little.
The next joke was a part of me hoped she would call, but did I really think she was going to? I'll never be good enough for anyone, what was I thinking, why did I even bother to ask her in the first place? I think it was just to prove I was right, I'm unwanted.
LONELINESS EQUALS SADNESS.
What’s a lung’s favorite type of exercise?
Breathing exercises.
I told this to my English teacher, and he said it to the class, and no one laughed. Someone help!
My mom told me to get off the computer or she will slam my head into the keyboard.
I don't think she lskdjfklsdjf.
What's the difference between your mom and a fat female cow...
A female cow doesn't have a dick.
Why do orphans have sex toys? Because the uncle isn't there.
Why is a brick always hard? Because the Indians played with it enough.
Why is a brick always hard? Because he seen the brick that was getting laid right next to him.
One day a rooster fell into a swimming pool and a cat laughed. And the moral of the story? A wet cock can always satisfy a pussy.
How do pirates like their movies?
You already know the answer, don't you?
Well...
ARRR rated! Huh huh huh...
Why did the orphan cross the road?
He thought he saw his parents.
Oasis, am I right?
Why does Michael Jackson do positions with kids in photos? Because they won’t do the same for him.
What is the most useless part of a vagina?
The woman.
Thing 1: What's the difference between nuts and almonds?
Thing 2: I don't know, what?
Thing 1: One gets hard faster.
What did the deaf, dumb, and blind orphan get for Christmas?
Cancer.
A leaf and an emo fall from a tree. Which hits the ground first?
The leaf. The rope stopped the emo.