Suggestion jokes
Fritz Cheng was asked to write three articles on the subject. He went to his grandmother and advised her: "Question: Kill people! I am sorry, Mr. Fritz, I am looking for his brother—what do you suggest?"
Brother: "I'm Superman. I am Superman!"
Fritz remembers entering the room. That's Alfredo's question in front of the TV: "Do you have any advice?"
Fritz tells a story from his school days. "Remember our words?" said Professor Fleck. "An artist? Is that true? Frison, who are you?"
"I am Superman. I'm Superman," he said. "I hope to meet the president."
What is the best Catholic dating app?
Grinder.
What's the best response to a girl saying, 'What's up?'
'If I tell you, will you sit on it?'
If you're ever in need of a punching bag, just go to your local Alzheimer's unit.
They'll forget you were there in like three minutes.
What website should you go to to look up LSD dealers?
TripAdvisor.com
Google is a woman because it doesn’t let you finish a sentence before it makes suggestions.
I suggested to my girlfriend that she would look sexier with her hair back.
Apparently, that’s insensitive to someone during chemo.
Roses are red, lemons are sour.
Spread your legs and give me an hour.
You should go soul searching. Maybe you'll find one.
Why is reverse cowgirl banned in Alabama? Because you never turn your back on family.
Not a joke, but here's a good workout, I guess:
Sit-ups: 50
Push-ups: 40
Squats: 30
Do 5 sets.
People should build orphanages next to graveyards so at least orphans can see their parents.
Pornhub suggesting me MILF on Mother's Day...
My friend: I want to cut myself.
Me: No, don’t do that. *hands lighter* Do this instead.
Don't listen.
Q: What did the porn actress say when she opened the door?
A: Make sure to come upstairs!
Yo mama's so fat, when she walked by the TV when I was watching a show, I waited, and when she finally passed by, Netflix said suggestions: Hulu, and Peacock.
If you're seeing this, this is your sign to go fuck yourself.
What sexual position produces the ugliest kids? Ask your mum!
Someone should start a vaping company with the slogan: "Vapes that hit harder than your dad." Sales would skyrocket.