on the first day of school, the teacher asked a student " what are your parent's names?" the student replied " my father's name is Laughing and my mother's name is smiling" the teacher said " are you kidding" the student said, "no kidding is my brother I am joking."
Teacher to Student: You are supposed to be here at 9 am! Student: Oh, did I miss anything?
What do you call a hot tub full of special ed students?
Vegetable Soup.
A teacher was teaching her second-grade class about the government, so for homework that one day, she told her students to ask their parents what the government is. When Little Johnny got home that day, he went up to his dad and asked him what the government was. His dad thought for a while and answered, “Look at it this way: I'm the president, your mom is Congress, your maid is the workforce, you are the people and your baby brother is the future.”
“I still don't get it,” responded Little Johnny. “Why don't you sleep on it then? Maybe you'll understand it better,” said the dad. “Okay then...good night,” said Little Johnny and went off to bed. In the middle of the night, Little Johnny was awakened by his baby brother's crying. He went to his baby brother's crib and found that his baby brother had taken a crap in his diaper. So Little Johnny went to his parent's room to get help. When he got to his parent's bedroom, he looked through the keyhole to check if his parents were asleep. Through the keyhole, he saw his mom loudly snoring, but his dad wasn't there. So he went to the maid's room. When he looked through the maid's room keyhole, he saw his dad having sex with his maid. Little Johnny was surprised, but then he just realized something and thinks aloud, "OH!! Now I understand the government! The President is screwing the workforce, Congress is fast asleep, nobody cares about the people, and the future is full of s**t!"
When the school shooter finds you and you think you’re gonna die but he remembers the time you gave him a pen. 🖌
When you are sleeping in class and the shooter sees you then they wake you up and say let’s team up like wtf
imagine u go to school right u hit the curve the bus driver be like ahhh how do i stop the bus students from the bus jump from the windows one of the students THAT'S a U Problem
One day in class, little Johnny was mucking around, not listening to the teacher. After 5 minutes, the teacher caught him, finished what she was saying, and said, "Little Johnny, if you weren’t listening, what was the last thing I said?" And little Johnny replied back, "You said, 'What was the last thing I said?'"
When the school shooter is about to leave the room, then the autistic kid says, "Goodbye!"
There's a kid named Little Johnny who would always cuss. Well, one day, he was sitting in class and the teacher said, "Let's play a game." So the game was she calls out a letter and someone raises her hand and tells her a word that begins with that letter. The teacher says "A". Little Johnny raises his hand and the teacher thinks to herself, "Well, he might say something like a**." So the teacher calls on Sally. Sally says "apple". The teacher says "B". Little Johnny raises his hand. The teacher thought, "No, he might say something like b!tch." So the teacher goes all the way to R. The teacher says "R". Little Johnny raises his hand and says, "Me, me, please, I really know one." Then the teacher thinks to herself, "Well, there's no cuss word that starts with R," so she said, "Okay, Johnny, give me a word that starts with R." Little Johnny says, "A rat!" and the teacher, very pleased, says, "Very good, Johnny. What type of rat?" Little Johnny says, "A big gosh damn mother freaker."
Sorry, I had to edit some word, but y'all know what I meant.
what do you call greg in your class? obese
someone at my school the other day said the whoever killed hittler was a hero. whos going to tell him?
When the school shooter finds you under the table;
Wonderful weather we're having!
why cant a orphan go to college? He needs a
Parent signature________
Teacher: what's your favorite animal
Me: Desert Eagle
Teacher:why?
Me:cause it fits in my backpack
Toto is at school and asks if he can go to the bathroom. The teacher says no.
Then, she asks Toto, “Where is the biggest river in the world?”
“Under my bench,” he replies.
Teacher: this assignment is big. Student(male): I have something that’s big. Teacher: yeah your forehead
teacher: “okay so how are you going?” student :“i’m not going” teacher” oh so your a wheelchair person”
The teacher once said to some students ̈i was an orphan before your principle hired me. ̈ the students said ̈oof that is sad ̈ the teacher tried to ignore them and take attendance she said ̈is anyone missing ̈ the students said ̈your parents. ̈ the teacher got offended and later that day quit her job
My teacher said he is gonna call my dad, I can't wait to meet him! 🥰🥰🥰
