Push ups jokes

"People are more honest when they are tired, so I made my nephew do push-ups 50 times when I realized he stole my cookies."

Not a joke, but here's a good workout, I guess:

Sit-ups: 50

Push-ups: 40

Squats: 30

Do 5 sets.

Not a joke but there's nowhere else to post this, (mainly this post is for the broke people without a gym). Did you know that the body can't tell if you're using weights? So lifting weights are optional.

Some beginner workouts without weights for like really weak people:

1. Sit-ups 10 reps 2. Push-ups 20 per reps 3. Squats 10 per reps 4. Crunches 10 per reps

How is a push-up bra like a bag of chips?

As soon as you open it, you realize it’s half empty.

Alright ALYA and drew ALYA's boyfriend!! Have a good fucking life, I hardly even think drew is real but uk whatever I've passed on but DREW if u fucking wanna beef, I'll fight u bro, ur prob a stick, I'm fucking doing push ups 4 times a week 100 each.

I'm thinking of getting a job as a gardener--pushing up the daisies!

When Chuck Norris does push-ups, he's pushing the Earth down.

"Chuck? How many push-ups can you do?" -- "All of them."