Philosopher jokes
Why did Marx never drink Earl Grey?
Because proper tea is theft.
Confucius says, "Man who walks through airport door sideways with erection, is going to Bangkok."
What is the difference between climate change and the greenhouse effect, once a philosopher, twice a sodomite?
Confucius say, "Man who bite electric wire get shocking experience!"
Steven Hawking
Stephen Hawking was a bit of a hardcase. He didn't let people push him around.
Get confused with Confucius!
An chemist, a physicist, and a mathematician are stranded on an island when a can of food rolls ashore.
The chemist and the physicist come up with many ingenious ways to open the can. Then suddenly the mathematician gets a bright idea: "Assume we have a can opener..."
Confucius say, man who runs behind car will get exhausted, but man who runs in front of car will get tired.
Confucius say:
"Man with hole in pocket feel cocky all day."
