Overstatement jokes

"Chuck? How many push-ups can you do?" -- "All of them."

Chuck Norris destroys the yo mama!

The happier they get, the less they see.

Forehead is so big that you wear a bed sheet for a bandana.

So what if I can’t spell Armageddon? It’s not the end of the world.

I am right 95 percent of the time, who cares about that other 5 percent?

9 out of 10 Americans are stupid... I'm so glad I'm in the 1%.