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Deer

Shitpost master-general · 8 months ago

A screenshot of a 4chan post on a light green background. On the left, there is a small image of a brown deer standing in a forest, looking towards the right. Below the deer image, it says "34 KB JPG". To the right of the deer image, and continuing below it, is a block of text describing a disturbing hunting experience where the author and their grandfather witnessed a deer repeatedly slam its head into a rock until its skull shattered, then stood upright and walked into a river to die, leaving both the author and their grandfather traumatized.

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Employee

Heroin Monkey · 1 year ago

Immediate

Heroin Monkey · 1 year ago

MOM WHAT
THE FUCK!?
HOLY SHIT,
IT'S GREG!
MOM was GIVING HER WHOLE HEAD to Mr.
Winsky, and Vice Principal Roy is FUCKING DEAD!
As soon as I walked in these fuckers immediately acted
like they weren't just fucking crawling over each other.
That filthy homewrecker Mr. Winsky sent Mom and told
her to take me home. Fucking delinquents.
I have to tell Dad that Mom is a whore somehow. This
bitch needs to be sent to the streets.
3

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Money

Heroin Monkey · 1 year ago

Big Bird is standing looking downward. Below him text reads: "Big Bird once again kindly offers money to homeless Oscar. He knows fully well that Oscar would immediately use it to fulfill his heroin addiction, which is precisely what he wants. Enough money to help him stay addicted, but not enough to get him to quit or die. An endless cycle of suffering that keeps him throbbingly erect at night."

Shower

Anonymous · 1 year ago

A cartoon man with a stern expression says, "Please take a shower immediately."

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Shot

Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

The image is a meme comparing the reactions of three U.S. presidents, Ronald Reagan, John F. Kennedy, and Theodore Roosevelt, to being shot. For Ronald Reagan, the text says he "gets shot once," "cries about it," and "immediately enacts gun control like a scared baby." For John F. Kennedy, it says he "gets shot twice," "eats the first shot for breakfast," and the "second shot blows his brains all over his wife on live TV like a boss." For Theodore Roosevelt, it says he "gets shot once while giving a speech in front of a huge audience," "laughs it off," and "continues to give his speech for the next hour while roasting the would-be assassin."

Fat

ℑ𝔪 𝔚𝔦𝔱𝔥 𝔖𝔱𝔲𝔭𝔦𝔡 · 2 years ago

UHM U CANT CALL PPLS FAT NOWADAYS

A man with a beard and a cat filter on his face points his finger. The text above him says, "Potentially Pregnant."

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Driver

Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

A screenshot of a Twitter post by user @smilingnodding. The post text reads: "Lyft driver is going double the speed limit, has a check engine light on, and is blasting Slipknot. I immediately took the wheel, crashed the car, and burned it down along with the Slipknot CD. #deathtoallposers"

Year

Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

The image is a screenshot of a 4chan post with green text on a black background. It depicts a dystopian scenario in a future where Hillary Clinton has become a supreme ruler and implemented a series of drastic measures.

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Pokemon card

Wade · 2 years ago

A Pokemon card featuring a plush shark toy labeled "May" as a basic Pokemon with 30 HP. The card includes attacks named "Suicidal Karen" and "Victimize," and the text reads, "If you come across this Pokémon in the wild, RUN. Run away immediately, kill it if you can, but fuckin RUN."

Story

Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

The image shows a green cartoon character with red eyes. Below the image is text of a story about a date gone wrong, ending with the line "That's my story of how I got cockblocked by motherfucking al qaeda."

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People

Gummy gummy gummy bear · 2 years ago

A bar graph showing what gives people feelings of power. Money is at the bottom, then status, and then a far longer bar for saying shhh in a loud room and everyone going quiet immediately. Text reads: WHAT GIVES PEOPLE FEELINGS OF POWER. MONEY. STATUS. SAYING SHHH IN A LOUD ROOM AND EVERYONE GOING QUIET IMMEDIATELY.

Pokemon card

Wade · 2 years ago

Isn’t this card just great?(if I revamp it I’m gonna make it more pathetic lmao)

A Pokémon card featuring a plush shark named May, described as a "Transgender Pokémon". The card lists moves such as "Suicidal Karen" and "Victimize". The card also includes a warning to "RUN" if encountered in the wild.

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Upvote

TechPriestGotDrip · 3 years ago

We must send upvotes immediately

A toaster with a slice of bread inside. The bread has an upvote arrow on it. The text reads: "When I see a meme with no upvotes:".

Party

KatsukiBakugouSimp · 3 years ago

i have no comment

A character with dark hair, red eyes, and horns is reclining and holding a phone with a black screen. He says, "Lucifer: Diavolo's holding a party. Everyone, come immediately."