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Genie

Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

A close-up of a cartoon man with wide eyes and a slightly concerned expression, under the text "The genie looking at me after I wished for all suicidal people to be immortal."

Snitch

Heroin Monkey · 1 year ago

A page from a 'Diary of a Wimpy Kid' style book. The text entry from Monday, December, reads, 'Today was fucking dreadful. Me and the boys were just watching porn on the school computers in computer science. Nothing harmful. You know how it goes, though. There's always some bitch across the room, just waiting, dying to ruin the fun.' Below the text is a cartoon drawing of a computer lab. Three boys are at computers. A girl, Patty, points at one boy (Greg) and shouts, 'GREG IS WATCHING PORNOGRAPHY, MR JIZZLE!' Another boy, Greg's friend, yells, 'WHAT THE FUCK?!' The text continues below the drawing: 'The next time I see Patty, I swear to god, that snitch is fucking dead.'

Highway

Heroin Monkey · 9 months ago

A view from inside a car looking out onto a multi-lane highway on an overcast day. A large red octagonal stop sign, attached to a bent piece of metal, is lodged on the front of the vehicle, partially obstructing the driver's view. Traffic is visible ahead. The caption reads: 'Gang am I still supposed to stop 😂😭'.

Incest

Heroin Monkey · 10 months ago

Mal is from alabama

COVID-19

killer of bears 101 · 3 years ago

The image is split into two panels, each featuring a dog with glasses and a turtleneck, with text above. The left panel reads, "me when I call it Tar-jay instead of Target," while the right panel reads, "me when i call it COVID-19 instead of the rona."

Curry

Hgfdfrgt · 3 years ago

A person named Caleb is in a live video. A user named jasmine comments: "if they ain't curry ima scurry." Caleb replies: "I'm Hispanic I MAOO"

School Year

freddyfatbear · 3 years ago

tru

A man with a goofy smile, wearing a suit and glasses, holding a banana. Above him, the text says "Parents preparing for the new school year" and below him the texts says "I have no idea what's going on"

Vr

Heroin Monkey · 1 year ago

A screenshot of comments on a social media platform. The first comment praises VR for experiences like boxing, zombie apocalypse, lightsaber fights, and 'porn' (represented by a corn emoji). A reply asks 'Which porn?' The original commenter responds, explaining they accidentally clicked 'for women' thinking it was 'four women' and ended up with a 'boner' (represented by an eggplant emoji) in their virtual face, describing it as the 'Gayest experience' of their life.

Abortion

Heroin Monkey · 1 year ago

A photo shows a doll that resembles an unborn baby next to text that reads: "If I was a girl, I would get pregnant as many times as possible, then have abortions after the third month of being pregnant so I would deliver a potato sized 1/3 developed dead fetus, then I would take the fetus, put it in a jar of preservative liquid and put it on a shelf in a secret room in my house, and I would do it until I had so many the rooms walls were nothing but potato sized aborted fetuses. Then I would have a kid and when they're bad I would make them sit in the fetus room and remind them of how easy I could have aborted their ass."

Cinema worker

Heroin Monkey · 1 year ago

A square-headed man is staring intensely. The text reads: "how the cinema worker looks at me when I yell 'water bucket release' and piss all over the family of 4 in front of me."

Test

Heroin Monkey · 1 year ago

A still from Peaky Blinders shows Cillian Murphy looking directly at the viewer. Text above him describes a student who is taking a test.

Death eater

Anonymous · 1 year ago

Can't believe this movie came out in 2005.

A still image from the movie Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire shows several figures wearing dark robes and pointy hoods. Two of the figures have skull masks. The text above the image says "When the Death-eaters appeared in 'Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire' (2005), I thought they were an evil version of the KKK."

Regret

Heroin Monkey · 1 year ago

A notification from iRobot at 10:00 AM states: "Floor Slut requires your attention. Floor Slut is stuck near a cliff." Above this is text stating: "I have zero regrets on naming my Roomba."

Promise

✨Jassy✨ · 3 years ago

If you can relate follow me pls

The image shows a text about promises and expectations, with rain drops as a background. The text reads, "Don't Make Me A Promise. Don't make me a promise you can't keep. Don't tell me things that you don't mean. Don't whisper sweet nothings that I can't hear. Don't tell me you'll meet me then not be there. Don't give me tomorrow and leave me in yesterday. Don't give me things then ask me to pay. Don't say you remember then forget. Don't make me believe you then have regret. Don't say its the truth when its a lie. Don't say hello to tell me goodbye. Don't say this is real when its make believe. Don't say how you feel then act differently. Don't make me laugh then make me weep. Don't make me a promise that you can't keep." At the bottom, it reads, "AngelinaBlue2010".

Client

Anonymous · 3 years ago

guess who this is

The image shows a man with glasses, a small beard and a red jacket reclining on a red couch. The text above the image says, "If a client tells you: I know people that charge less". Below the image, it says, "Respond: I got clients that pay more."

Anime girl

The Unknown King of Moderation · 3 years ago

I have achieved portable anime girls

A laptop screen displays the title screen of the video game "Doki Doki Literature Club!" featuring four anime-style female characters.

Daughter

Caitlyn 🐈🦋 · 3 years ago

I bet my mum thinks this 😂

The image shows a yellow square with black text stating, "Having a teenage daughter is a lot like your house being haunted. Every now and then you see a figure in the corner of your eye, followed by a moaning sound, and then a door will slam shut."

Cookie

DADDY sus aka the king · 3 years ago

hahahahahaha

$A photo shows a gingerbread-man-like creature with a disturbing expression and a bow tie. The text above says, "Me: \"I feel like I'm forgetting about something.\" The cookies I put in the oven 4 hours ago:".$

Hitler

Shitpost master-general · 10 months ago

This is so relatable :3

A split image. On the left is a close-up illustration of a pink and purple anthropomorphic fox character with large, expressive eyes, labeled "Sensitive femboy fox." On the right is a black and white portrait of Adolf Hitler in a uniform, labeled "Hitler." Above both images, in white text on a black background, it reads "I HAVE 2 SIDES."

Girl

⛧ 𝓪𝓶𝔂 ⛧ · 2 years ago

man this hits

A social media post from the subreddit r/teenagers with the title: 'Bruh yk what I want?' The post reads: 'Just to be lying down, arms around a girl not just cause she's hot or cute but cause I genuinely care about her and love her and she feels the same way. Just to be like holding her close and maybe stroking her hair. Maybe at one point giving her a soft kiss or two before she'd fall asleep into my arms so I could drift off too. Yes I am cuddle horny.'

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