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my friend tbh

A person in a white shirt and a blue scarf waving their wet hands around to dry them, with the text: "When you need to dry your hands and there aren't any towels left."

♢ Shy Dragon ♢

A drawing shows a method to cheer up a friend. In the first panel, a woman brushes her teeth and wonders 'why am I alive'. The second panel shows the same woman squeezing out of a toothpaste tube onto a toothbrush. A text next to her says 'hahaha surprise'

♢ Shy Dragon ♢

This definitely works

The image is a drawing with four separate life tips on how to make your friends like you more. First, a person is smiling and has a feather tucked in their collar bone, it says 'do a smile to make yourself look like you are not completely dead inside' and 'hold a feather to let your friend know you are not harmful anymore and it is all in the past.' Second, the same person is wearing a lace glove, it says 'wear a single lace glove to show that you have a delicate touch.' Third, it says 'why not wear an outfit that really shows off your figure'. Fourth, a blonde person is holding a leash attached to a dog. It says 'borrow a dog or a child of your choice so people will want to talk to you more'.

Two hippos with open mouths, resembling laughter, are placed below the text "Me and my best friend laughing at our own jokes."

The image shows a text above Spongebob's face. The text reads: "Teacher: stop the laughing. Friend: breaths. Me:". Below is Spongebob making a strained face with blush marks on his cheeks.

A screenshot from a TV show, showing a woman with long blond hair (Daenerys Targaryen) half-naked in front of some candles. The text says "This is why". Above, the text says "Me: I hate watching movies with subtitles. Friend: but why?"

A screenshot of the video game Elden Ring, showing a character with the name "****er", due to the game censoring the word "butt". The full character name should be Butter.

The image shows two panels. The first one shows an older man with a long white beard, presumably Noah, looking somewhat confused, with the text "Noah?" underneath. The second panel shows Noah with a glowing effect, as if illuminated from within, with the text "Get the boat." underneath. Above these two panels is the text: "A friend got mad at me for smelling his sister's underwear. I don't know if it was because she was still wearing them or because the rest of the family was there. Either way it made the rest of the funeral very awkward."

help me please im being abused

The image shows a person with blonde hair and a red tie with his hand up in a stop gesture. A blue button with the word 'WALL' is shown in the left corner.

help me please im being abused

Bandobritt stan account
@Tripolar_B
You ever had a racist experience but it was
funny tho
xanthus stan account
@tobikyere
when i was meeting friends at Nando's and
when i got there the server walked me over to a
table of random Black people and we just
stood/sat there looking at each other like this

A young person is sitting in a car with a slightly displeased look on their face. Text above the person reads: "When your friend is making fun of you to impress a girl."

Shep

Two men hold a sign at the airport. The sign reads, "Welcome Home Sean! Congrats on your PAROLE! Remember, you can't be within 100 yards of that sheep farm!" There are two images of a sheep's rear end with a no symbol over them.

Two drawings of a character named Sukuna side by side. The left drawing shows Sukuna crying with the text 'Sukuna, heal my friend!' and the right drawing shows Sukuna with a smirk and the text 'No.'

1) buy a lobster
[deleted] by
My friend is in forensics and works on crime
scenes. They find a woman laying on the
bathroom floor with a head wound and live
baby shrimp on the floor with a smell of burnt
residue. After 3 days of investigation, they
figured out what happened.
Long story short, she bought a lobster from
the market. In the market, they feed the
lobster live baby shrimp until they're sold. This
woman brings the lobster home, inserts the
lobster's tail into her vagina, lights a lighter
and puts the flame towards the lobster's head,
so the lobster will frantically start shaking his
tail (which is inside her vagina), giving her the
jollies. Apparently she killed the lobster from
burning his head too long, the lobster, being
dead, voids his bowels, causing this lobster to
shit live baby shrimp into her vagina. This
woman then goes to pee and sees live baby
shrimp crawling out of her vagina, she freaks
out, falls, and cracks her head open on the
bathtub and dies.
it happened in Chicago in 2001
?
---
14
1) wait for horny
Chicago 2001
"Lobster Love" Incident

A Pokemon card featuring a plush shark toy labeled "May" as a basic Pokemon with 30 HP. The card includes attacks named "Suicidal Karen" and "Victimize," and the text reads, "If you come across this Pokémon in the wild, RUN. Run away immediately, kill it if you can, but fuckin RUN."

Two tweets from user @xMangojuice. The first one says: "2star yelp review @xMangojuice. went camping with my uncircumcised friend and he didn't even bring a sleeping bag? lol he's gonna be freezing tn". The second one says: "2star yelp review @xMangojuice. oh my god wait what is he doing".

The Movie

A grid of images with the title "Your own Romantic Comedy Cast Meme" at the top. The grid shows nine roles: The Main Character (a meme of a person with black hair), The Love Interest (a meme of a bald person), The Best Friend (a cartoon girl), The Love interest's Roommate (a cartoon of a green dinosaur), The Crazy ex (a troll face), The Pet (a kitten), The Kid Sibling (a pixelated image), and The Love Interest's parents (a badly drawn image of a person).

The image shows a muscular man with headphones on, and the text on the image says "SUCCESS REQUIRES REPLACEMENT" followed by a list of things to replace "with Alcohol", including "Alcohol", "Failing", "Overthinking", "Blame", "Toxic Friends", "Complaining", "Netflix marathons", and "Fake influencers".

A snowflake image on a dark blue background with the text: "Friends are like snowflakes. When you pee on them, they disappear."

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