Worst Jokes Ever

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Heroin Monkey

A two-panel comic strip. The top panel shows two men talking. The man on the left, bald and wearing an orange shirt, looks shocked and asks the man on the right, wearing a white t-shirt, 'Dude, How are you STILL wearing that shirt?!' The bottom panel is a close-up of the white t-shirt. The shirt has '9/11?' printed at the top left. To the right are illustrations of the Twin Towers with blood running down them. To the left is an illustration of Garfield the cat drawn like an airplane flying towards the towers. Below Garfield, the text reads: 'Yeah! I'll take 911 orders of Lasagna!'

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Heroin Monkey

A man is looking at his phone. The text says: "Dude, you're drunk, you can barely walk." Yeah no shit, that's why I'm gonna drive home, dumbass.

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Heroin Monkey

Heroin Monkey

Image shows Sonic the Hedgehog smiling and pointing, emerging from a noose. A speech bubble says: "Hey! C'mon, dude! Portal's this way!"

Caylez.cc

Low taper fade

A black and white image of a man, presumably Ninja, with text that reads, "Settle down, what is wrong? This dude shop single. The streets Justin wants his fade checked."

A Star Wars Fan

I ASKED THE PRESIDENT TO
MAKE IT LEGAL TO MURDER FURRIES
DUDE
WTF?!

THAT ONE FURRY HATER
PEOPLE WITH
A MORAL COMPASS

Heroin Monkey

A text message conversation. The first message says, "What's up?" The second says, "Dude, you're going to kill me. I was a little drunk last night and talking to your wife and I ended up banging her car in the driveway when I pulled out. I think I hit your daughter's bike too. I'll come fix it later, but please say sorry for me to your wife." The third message says, "Not delivered". The last message says "and your daughter".

Heroin Monkey

The image is a four panel comic. In the first panel, an ant is shown happily eating a crumb, thinking "Man, these are the best crumbs I've ever had!!" In the second panel, a man looks shocked, exclaiming "Ayoo dude no wayy!!" In the third panel, the man is holding up a sock with white fluid on it, saying, "I thought I lost this cum sock ages ago!!" The fourth panel shows a close-up of the ant, now with a disgusted expression.

Heroin Monkey

An ant is standing next to a bottle of antacid tablets. A speech bubble above the ant says, "Fuck dude, I'm tripping balls."

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✨Jassy✨

A screenshot of a text message exchange. One message says, "Come on, I wasn't THAT drunk was I?" The other says, "Dude, in WalMart when the intercom thing came on you dropped to your knees and screamed, 'THE LORD HAS SPOKEN!'" The first person then replies, "...Awesome"

rapboat

A screenshot of a Reddit thread. The question is "Which rapper's age surprises you the most?" The first commenter states "Pac and Big being 25 and 24 at their death always tripped me out, they looked and sounded way older imo." A second commenter replies "Crazy that biggie sounded like that at 24/25. Dude sounded like a 40 year old man." A third commenter chimes in "that's probably because he was fat asf."

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Heroin Monkey

A tweet shows the announcement that "Kung Fu Panda 4" crossed $480M at the worldwide box office, after which the tweeter comments on the next frame from the movie, in which the main character, Po the panda, looks completely shocked.

Anonymous

A screenshot of a text message conversation with a dark background. In the first message, a sender states, "Girl, you're really pretty!" The recipient replies, "Thanks, but I'm a dude." The sender then says, "Oh, you look like a girl. You trans?" The recipient responds, "No, I just have long hair." The sender replies with insults. There are emojis included.

Heroin Monkey

A rotisserie chicken is placed on the pages of an open book. The text overlay reads: "Didn't have a bookmark. Just using a rotisserie chicken instead. Dude wth is wrong with you. You can't even close the book, how is that a bookmark? Can't knock it till you try it."

Wade

Spider-Man and Deadpool are sitting at desks in a classroom. Spider-Man is writing on his test with a pen. Deadpool is writing with scissors. There is text that reads: "Pssst, spidey, what'd you get for number seven?" "Dude, shut up! I don't wanna get in trouble!" "I got Waterloo." "This is a math test!" Are we not going to talk about the fact that deadpool is writing with scissors.

Heroin Monkey

A stack of Monster energy drink cans are piled up like a tower on a table. To the right is a large Monster energy drink poster. The text on the image reads, "How dudes named Kyle decorate their apartment."

Heroin Monkey

The image is a movie poster with the text "DUDE, Where's my will to live". It features two guys on the poster, with Ashton Kutcher in the foreground, looking puzzled. There is a beach in the background with girls.

Heroin Monkey

The text on the image says: "The dude I pay to stop by once a week to pick up poop in my backyard just realized that I don't have pets."

Heroin Monkey

The image shows two photos of a bed with stains on the sheets. The first photo shows a light-colored bed with brown stains in the middle. The second photo shows a darker bed with more spread-out brown stains. The text at the top of the image says, "Gay dudes be like 'I'm a squirter'".

Heroin Monkey

A drawing of the evolution of man showing a human walking away with text: "When you walk in a party and see a bunch of dudes talking about bitcoin", followed by "LATER HOMO" and "H. sapiens (modern hum".

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