Cutting Off memes

I was sitting on my own in a restaurant when I saw a beautiful woman at another table. I sent her a bottle of the most expensive wine on the menu. She sent me a note, “I will not touch a drop of this wine unless you can assure me that you have seven inches in your pocket.” I wrote back, “Give me the wine. As gorgeous as you are, I'm not cutting off three inches for anyone.”

Q: Do you know why transgender people are good at being carpenters?

A: Because they have more experience cutting off their wood.

How do you keep a mute woman you've raped from telling on you?

By cutting off her fingers.