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Shitpost master-general

A screenshot of a Reddit comment thread. The first user, Deathcu..., writes a chaotic, rambling paragraph about Charlie Parker only playing scales, interspersed with repetitive exclamations about loving cigarettes, heroin, and tobacco. The second user, BionicTorqueWrench, replies with a simple correction: "Bro, Parker played arpeggios."

Shitpost master-general

Never forget the Holodomor

A dark, atmospheric oil painting depicting a hellish underworld. In the background, a massive, ancient stone fortress or palace with many arches is illuminated by fires. The foreground shows a river of molten lava or blood. A lone figure in a dark cloak stands on a rocky ledge overlooking the fiery expanse. Overlaid text reads: "THEM: HEAVEN GAINED ANOTHER ANGEL!" at the top, "ME IN HELL:" in the center, and "(I COULD ONLY FIND 271,000)" at the bottom.

A close-up selfie of a man's face, showing his eyes and the top of his nose, with text overlays above and below his eyes. The man has light blue eyes and light brown hair visible on his forehead. The text expresses an overly dramatic and intense plea for a reply, using terms like 'Kitten,' 'dagger,' 'alpha,' 'digital stars,' 'untamed dominance,' and 'pixelated princess.' The text is centered and appears in white font against transparent black bars.

A screenshot of a tweet from user Plain As Day Quavo. The tweet text reads 'Saw people were sharing their favorite lyrics so here's some of mine'. Below are four square panels. The top left panel shows a person covering their face, with the text 'through them hospital doors' and 'FLUSHING SCOTCH "COUGH SYRUP" COYOTE'. The top right panel shows Eminem with a boombox, with the text 'Meanwhile my attention's pulled in another direction. Some receptionist' and 'EMINEM "LIKE TOY SOLDIERS"'. The bottom left panel shows Robert Palmer, with the text 'Doctor, doctor, gimme the news' and 'ROBERT PALMER "BAD CASE OF LOVING YOU (DOCTOR, DOCTOR)"'. The bottom right panel shows Bob Geldof, with the text 'Something's wrong. She was lying on the bed. Crying when I walked in' and 'BOB GELDOF "I CRY TOO"'. Each lyric quote is enclosed in double quotes.

A screenshot of a Twitter thread by user 'ka vinki' (@jkavinsky). The first tweet says 'getting hit by a car kinda fun fr it feels like an action movie when u roll over the hood'. The second tweet is a reply to the first, stating 'driver was crying like she killed me or something relax'. The third tweet is another reply, saying 'nurse asked me to rate the pain 1 to 10 n i said 25 n started screaming i'm getting this morphine one way or another'.

A screenshot of a fake definition page for the skull emoji '💀' in slang. The title is 'Skull emoji in slang'. The definition states that the skull emoji in slang is a way to replace 'I'm a slutty Femboy' or 'Please fuck me with your big hard cock', commonly used by Femboys and very Lesbian women. It urges the reader to 'rid this world of "💀" users' and 'report any you find on the internet'. It then repeats '💀💀💀'. Below, it summarizes '💀 Skull emoji in slang meaning "please fuck me" or another scentence along the lines of "I'm a femboy"'. It is attributed 'by 💀💀💀💀💀💀💀 December 31, 2022'. Below that are buttons indicating 2539 likes, 342 dislikes, and a flag option.

An anonymous 4chan post from January 13, 2021, at 09:59:24 with the number 844740211. The post consists of a green text story:
"masturbating in bedroom", "about to cum", "dad comes running in naked screaming", "and here comes dad from left field!!", "he does a running jump", "lands asshole first on my dick", "penetration.png", "cum", "mfw he laughs and calls me a faggot for cuming in another guy". The post ends with "EVERY FUCKING TIME". To the left of the text is a drawing of Wojak pointing a gun at his head.

A man with an open mouth and wide eyes holds his hands on his head. The text above him says: "When bro expects to see 'cows' in my milk farm, but instead he sees 60 naked pregnant women with breast pumps attached and another 60 black mfs keeping them pregnant."

Two dogs are standing on grass. A black dog has its head on the head of a white dog. The text reads "Another one" and "The dust".

A blurred image shows a black and white cat appearing to rotate rapidly. The text above the cat reads, "Just Caught My Cat Shifting Into Another Dimension."

A four-panel comic strip shows cats reacting to a new cat meme. The first panel shows one cat in front of a computer saying, "The humans have released another cat meme." The second panel shows a second cat responding with, "That's speciesism!" The third panel shows the first cat pointing to a box with two other cats in it saying "Look!" The last panel shows the cats in the box responding with, "Well, we do love boxes." and "Yeah."

A page from a parody 'Diary of a Wimpy Kid' book featuring handwritten text and a cartoon illustration of Greg Heffley and his mother in a car. The text describes Greg witnessing his mother's infidelity and his resulting feelings of disgust and distrust, culminating in a tense conversation where she asks him to keep the secret.

The image shows Aragorn from the Lord of the Rings looking surprised. Above the image is the text "When Disney purchases LOTR" and below the image is the text "Somehow, Sauron has another ring."

A survey asking how likely someone is to recommend Windows 10 to a friend or colleague with a scale from 1 to 5. The explanation provided below states that people don't usually recommend operating systems randomly in conversations. Below the survey is written: "THIS IS NOT TRUE. Have you ever seen a linux user?"

A close-up selfie of the streamer Ninja with bright blue hair, sitting in a car and wearing a seatbelt. A text overlay reads: 'Just roundhouse kicked another pregnant muslim in the stomach, thank me later #bombdefused'.

A screenshot of a text conversation. The first person asks about a Miata for sale. After some questions, the first person asks "What's your lowest point?" and the second person responds with a tragic personal anecdote about his wife leaving him, misunderstanding that the first person was asking for the "lowest price."

The image shows three panels depicting the evolution of Yamaha's products over time. In 1900, the company is producing pianos. By 1955, they are producing motorcycles. By 1960, they have added boats to their line of products.

A black dog has its head over a white dog's head. The text on the image reads: "Another one" next to the black dog and "The dust" next to the white dog.

An image of an iPhone message thread. One message says, "Missing u like crazy rn.." The response is, "What the fuck." Then, the first person writes, "Shit autoco" and "Autocorrect." Below that is a message from AT&T stating, "All of the add'l 1GB of shared data added to your plan in this billing period is used. We've added another shared 1GB FOR $15 to your plan for use through 3/20/2022. Avoid add'l data charges by using our..."

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