If trees could kill you, they wood.
Lumber Jokes
What Kind of Hardware store can't orphans go into?
Home Depot.
What do you call an Indian with a wooden leg? Shit on a stick.
What do you call an Indian with two wooden legs? A waste of lumber.
What did the tree say when it gets horny? My wood has a splinter.
Men, get into the kitchen and make me a sandwich!
Women, go chop some lumber!
White people, get back into the cotton fields!
