What made you suddenly lose interest in someone you were pursuing?
When I found out they liked me back. Not interested in someone with poor judgment.
I know Marie Antoinette jokes aren't funny, but they're nothing to lose your head over.
Jokes about Marie Antoinette aren't funny but that's no reason to lose your head.
Someone asked the former 2016 presidential candidate Hillary Clinton why she lost the 2016 presidential election to Donald John Trump, and the former 2016 presidential candidate Hillary Clinton said, "Because someone asked her what she would do for a Klondike Bar?"
Your mom's been giving me attitude lately, so I told her to shut her mouth. When she did, it caused me to lose 4 inches.
Why are people from New York so bad at chess?
Because they quickly lose two towers (rooks).
Why can't England play chess? Because they have no queen, and they will soon lose their king.
How is a marriage like a hurricane?
In the beginning, there’s a lot of sucking and blowing, but at the end, you lose your house.
Hillary Clinton lost last time to the first African American president, Barack Obama. Why will she lose this one to Donald Trump?
Because orange is the new black.
In what city do you always lose your mum? Mumbai.
Why do emos suck at playing tic-tac-toe on their wrists?
Because when they win, they lose.
What war did the black community win?
The Obama era. Only to lose to a smarter white person.
Why did the plane go to KFC?
To lose its wings and crash!
911 happened a while ago and it's slowly losing its fame.
Time for a remake!
Why did Al Qaeda lose $100 on a bet?
They bet $100 that they wouldn't crash when they went through the Twin Towers.
What's the same with shoes and slaves?
When they get loose, you tie them up.
So, this guy, right? He has been through the worst shit in his life. He lost his house, his car, his wife, his kids, everything except his dog.
About 2 weeks after he loses everything, he goes to apply for a job. He attends work for the first 2 weeks to get his first paycheck and then calls in sick for about a month. He comes back to his boss' office after the month is over and his boss questions him. The man claims, "Sir, I was blowing chunks." "What do you mean by 'blowing chunks'?" says the boss. The man replies with, "Chunks is the name of my dog..."
How did the orphan lose its parents?
Its parents never came back from getting milk.
If a Muslim loses his Faith... Does he throw in the Towel?
White girl: So this crystal cures my depression and helps me lose weight?
Me holding a rock of meth: YES!!!
