Howe jokes
How do you know if an Asian has broken into your house?
Your dog is gone. ;)
A child asks his father, "How do you get pink eye?"
Son, I was told it’s from scratching your butt, then rubbing your eyes.
Then the son asks, "How did I get Fungi?" As the father was about to answer, the boy says, "Ohh, so is it from scratching my stinky feet, then rubbing my eye?" ———-Fungeye
How did the guy greet his wife?
"Howdy, sister!"
There was a doctor's room filled with 20 women, 4 kids, 15 men, and 1 dog. However, there were forty foreheads. How is this possible?
(They will think 44 heads, not 40 foreheads.)
Because there are 40 foreheads, not 44 heads.
Sat at a busy intersection with a slice of bread, waiting for a traffic jam.
Cut a hole in the rug so he could see a dirty floor show.
He took hay to bed to feed his nightmare.
Took a tape measure to bed to see how long he slept.
Put his nose out the window so the wind will blow it.
Died with his boots on because he didn't want to hurt his toes when he kicked the bucket.
First Man: My dog's got no nose.
Second Man: How does he smell?
First Man: Awful.
How do you stop a skunk from smelling?
Hold its nose.
Worst joke ever.
You’ll parsley believe how many puns I have. Hopefully your funny-bone isn’t broken because these are real rib-ticklers.
How do you know if an Asian has been in your house?
Your dog's gone.
Your finances are done.
And your floaties.
How do you make a baby float?
You take your foot off its head.
How do people in Alabama get circumcised? You knee your sister's jaw...
Q: How many more chemo treatments did the cancer patient need?
A: Tumor.
Four cows went to the county fair. They saw a sign that said that next year animals can enter a singing contest. They decided that they would enter next year. So they called their group the "4 Cs Quartet" since their names were Clementine, Candy, Cookie, and Columbine.
They discovered how they could win. After a discussion, they decided to eat as much corn as possible, so they would sing in perfect 4 part hominy.
How do you quiet a baby down?
Make baby back ribs for dinner.
A man was taking a young child into the woods.
The young child said, "Mister, it's getting dark and I'm scared."
The man replied with, "How do you think I feel? I have to go back alone."
Guess how I got away from my mom saying I can't play Fortnite? I took my stuff and I ran to Iran.
How did Stephen Hawking die?
He traveled too far from the outlet.
How long are you? I
What did one ankle say to the other? Good morning, how are you today?
How did I get to Iraq? I ran.