Hes jokes
I call my dad a motherfucker because he fucked my mom.
I call my dad a motherfucker because he fucked his mom.
Why did the lemon 🍋 go to the doctor 👩⚕️?
Because he had a sour stomach.
What do you call an orphan with parents?
Idk, I never met one before.
Bonus joke: I went up to an orphan and asked where his parents were. He said, "I don’t have any." I said, "Wonder why."
Another bonus joke: Me: Hey. Orphan: Hey. Me: What do you do for fun? Orphan: Look for my parents. Me: Me, so they're not dead? Orphan: No, they just abandoned me.
More bonus: What do you call a homeless kid?
An orphan.
Last bonus: Why don’t orphanages teach kids about home?
Because they can’t find one.
lmao this is so funny, dark humor can be funny. Sorry, orphans!
I once asked the guy sitting next to me if he had any Sodium Hypobromite... He said, "NaBrO."
Who works at IHOP? A girl with one leg.
P1: Why did the chicken cross the road?
P2: To get to the other side DUH?!?
P1: No dumbass, it's to get run over because he has depression, a chronic illness, and his father left him for a good for nothing pimp that doesn’t even give a shit about how he feels. (Kinda like me).
P2: Holy shit are u ok? *Some random eavesdropping fucker dials 911 in a hurry*
How did Caillou quit his party?
He had to cancel it.
One time in camp, I kissed my bunkmate Bret in the shower. He cupped my breasts and lathered them in Prell, but I'm totally not gay... :)
Do this on a calculator.
There was this girl who was (13) but she wanted to be (84) but she was (45) but the doctor said (0). He said take these tablets (2x) a day, but she took them (4x) a day, and she ended up boobless.
So Joe was at the store and he was looking for a dildo.
Then he saw one made out of dick skin, so he grabbed it and uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh UhuhUhUhUhUhuHuHuHuHUHUHUHUHUHUHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH went his mouth.
PENIS PENIS
There was a man. He came home with his friends from the bar and man was he ever wasted! Their friends made sure to get him home safely. The next morning, he woke up and found blood all over his nightstand. He called his friends and asked for his alarm clock back.
Q. Why did the cow cross the road?
A. Because he/she wanted to watch the moooovie.
Why was the depressed man happy in food-tech?
He got to cut himself.
An orphan went up to Nikola Tesla and asked to travel in time. He then saw his parents put him in a building, saying, "You now live here!"
Why did the Indian cross the road?
Because he opened a corner shop on the other side.
What did Hitler say when he was blindfolded?
I can Nazi!
Why was the baseball player stuck in the stadium?
'Cause he made his home run.
Why did the boy throw the clock out the window?
He wanted to see time fly.
Kobe was on fire before his death. He was on fire after too.
Why did the OREO go to the dentist?
Because he needed a filling. 😂