Envy jokes
Has anyone else ever been jealous when their laptop dies?
Why is Donald Trump so jealous of Usain Bolt?
Because he successfully finished a race!
Sometimes I get jealous when I see a gravestone.
Why are Elmo’s jealous of lights?
Lights are hanging.
Why are emos jealous of light?
The lights are hanging.
The man was dangling by a string!
I was jealous the day he died.
Sometimes I get jealous when my phone dies.
I was gonna walk up to an emo and say, "Do you get jealous when your phone dies?"
Do you get jealous of your clothes when they hang from the line?
I got jealous of the zebras. Sorry, I’ll cut it out. I wanted to practice for my med school test.
I bet emo girls get jealous when people cut paper.
Why was the emo jealous of the orange?
It came precut.
Your hairline is so hideous that Derrick White's hairline envies yours.
How do you make a blind person jealous? You ask if it's a nice day out.
Sometimes I am happy, and there are times I envy my dog.
I got jealous when my phone died.
The bushes outside got jealous after they saw your eyebrows.
I hate when my class want to play hangman. Not because they hang a man, but because I get jealous.
I'm jealous of your heart because it's pumping in you and I'm not.
My sis was funny but sad because I have a boy and she doesn't.