Envy of a Gravestone's Peacefulness and Quietness, Permanently and Absolutely Soundless

@girlkisser

ok

I don't wanna hurt mal

but I don't wanna hurt anymore

cause all caring has done is fucked me and my life up

No.

Charlie. I'm not angry at you at all

ok?

I'm equally worried about you and mal.

cute

go to Mal helkp her

ok

She just needs to refresh her day

hm.

I've fake-dated her before. I know her

y'know whats cute

What

Mal nor you just went straight telling me to change and not do this

but not what's wrong not why

just mals saying shell leave

Wich I understand

nd Yu going to talking abt malk.

Mal*

She wasn't thinking why. She was thinking of what the problem was

Tell me why you smoked the joint.

Just what got you to do it

nothing.

Gotta put my phone away

ok.

Kinda back

So you just felt like it?

no.

wtvr

my case manager told me

Then it isn't nothing

depression

makes you feel alone and not cared for or about

even if I have a million pple

but anyways

im sick or liking a guy and shit going bad

esp when the last one broke me

nd then next guy I start to like

is getting abused

and somehow added to the list of pple I'm terrified I wont see tmwr

I would rather have three close friends that are really really good than three million mediocre friends

so why do I spend hours praying for Lilly, and so many other pple just to heal mentally or physically

nd why do I have to care abt pple

when I've just been fucking hurt

big things small things

I get mals done with me

I really struggle making friends, but once they're established, I'm there for them

and everything is telling me I'd be better off alone

when I text parker

You love people

asking for help

he dosent have to,me for me

asking NBA and boby for help

they tell me I'm cooked and move on they don't care

I ask v for help

she changes it to her

I ask Emma or mia I get ignored

I begged my dad for help

maybe its not everyone

but its enough

And i know how that turned out

to get ignored when I'm surrounded by pple

I feel alone no matter fucing what

One friend is enough.

except when I was w. alain

I cant go Mal or you because if I told you my fucking thouhgfs

you'd leave or worry so much

so do wtvr you want

if you leave or she leaves that's ok

Charlie

I need more weed

I mean

Are you crying now?

I promised mel nd anavbell nd paris I wouldn't hurt myself

but if they'll just leave why do I care?

Because you can

all caring has done

Because you care about people deeply

take away my sister, kept my dad

let me be used over and over again

leave pple I love

stick the fuck around

So that's the problem

You just don't know the solution

But the solution ain't to stop caring

You have to care about yourself

I know you can

this bs.

The fact that you're still alive today proves it

I'll ttyl, cosmo.

This bs is real, Charlie

Gn Charlie