DoS jokes
How do you tell the difference between a Communist and everybody else? The way they are spelled.
A blind guy and his seeing eye dog walk into a bar.
The blind guy starts swinging the dog around on the leash.
The bartender yells, "Sir, stop! What are you doing!?"
The blind guy says, "I'm just looking around."
It's weird how Stephen Hawking's last name sounds like "walking and talking," but he could not do either of those!
What does the ocean do to its friends?
It waves.
(*Sorry I wasn't making any jokes for a while, I was getting sick of this thing.*)
Please, this is disgusting. This is only men who think that it’s fun to do jokes about rape. It’s really fucking dramatic for a man/woman to get raped, so please just shut the fuck up!
Memes
What do you call an Indian person who is not starving? Dead.
After the shooting, people were asking why they would do it.
They wanted to stop but it turns out they were playing an online game.
How do you find a redneck virgin?
Just look for a 4-year-old. They can run faster than her brothers.
What do you get if you cross a pig and a witch with sand?
A ham sandwich.
If you have sex and your African parents find out,
“You can do the boom boom. But you can not do the boom boom in my house. Do it somewhere else."
How do you turn a straight guy into a gay guy? Well... for starters, you grab that ass of his, drag him into the bathroom, and tell him to suck my long, big pineapple, and thus you have yourself one straight guy converted into a dick-sucking machine.
What do you call a swearing piece of shit?
Cus-turd.
What does a skeleton say when it has a lot of stuff?
"I have a skele-TON of stuff to do."
Me and my mom order Chinese food. So when it came, my mom grabbed the egg roll and started to suck it down. Then I ask my mom what are you doing. Then my mom says, "I love you for 5 dollar."
Where do terrorists go for a drink?
At the Allahu-ak Bar.
Why do people adopt orphans?
They get cash.
What do you call an autistic army special forces?
Why do orphans like boomerangs so much?
Because they come back.
Me: Spanish teacher, why do we need to learn Spanish?
Teacher: Because you might go to Mexico and start a job.
Me: Why would I want to sell drugs?
What do your BF and the Twin Towers have in common?
They both never get erect.